AArgh... neighbors

Page 6 of 10  


She's reading into me what lives in her.
--
Ann, gardening in Zone 6a
South of Boston, Massachusetts
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expounded:

car
etc?
neighbors
What
are
sell.
I feel your pain and I'd not be too thrilled either, but I agree that at the end of the day, they can do whatever the hell they want. It's their property and their mortgage. Until I start paying it, it's none of my business.
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People are always okay and tolerant till it effects them, or their hot button issue is raised. I live in a 31 home development. Homes in here go from 250 to 450. Out of respect for one another, we maintain the front of our homes. Mine, of course, is the most wild, but its got order in the chaos. However, when I learned one of our neighbors down the cul-de-sac was selling their home, I went out and trimmed out all the dead flowers from the Gaura lindheimerii, pulled out all the dead larkspur stalks, etc. I put down mulch to neaten things up. Rather civil.
I assure you that if a huge mess was happening in our little neighborhood it would piss me off. My one neighbor has two trailers in his driveway, which is a four car driveway. One has a barrel BBQ pit thing, the other is for hauling stuff. His truck sticks out onto the sidewalk. People reported it and those things are now gone and we can walk down the street again. Yay.
So, rest assured, people "say" it doesn't bother them, or it's none of their business, but when it effects them they squeal as loud as everyone else.
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opined:

neighbors
What
are
because
sell.
button
250 to

Mine,
when I

went
pulled out

it
which is a

hauling
those
their
I agree. If you notice that Ann, who claims that nothing is any of her business, started by lamenting the mess in her neighbor's yard. There is a difference between "it's none of my business" and having an opinion about something.
I think you also hit on the essence of this problem. Maintaining the exterior of your home at approximately the same level as your neighbors is a simple courtesy. I don't expect people to recreate Longwood Gardens, but it doesn't cost anything to pick up your trash and to pull a few weeds. I think that people who park across the sidewalk, for example, are at best selfish, and at worst just giving everyone the finger.
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-snip-

Mind you, nobody likes this man. I am ambivalent after living next door to him for five years; I let go of the whole thing. He is very disliked in the neighborhood and actually I am the only neighbor who talks to him.
One other person talks to him, and this bad neighbor calls him "the a-rab." Typical Texan who gives all of Texas a really bad name. The man he refers to is from Lebanon, lovely people. Ten cats all outside. Not any more. We have laws in our town preventing loose animals. I suggested they build a kitty run and they did and the cats are safe from the foxes living in my backyard, and the occasional coyote which comes up from the creek to our yards, and bobcats which I've also seen.
Eh. One day this will all be sold and we'll have our Safari motor home and we'll be nomads. This is our goal and dream in life. No neighbors. If we don't like where we're parked, we move!
Victoria
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I guess reading comprehension isn't your forte. I wasn't lamenting a thing, I stated facts, and also told you I still bought the house. But do continue misconstruing, it's getting pretty amusing.
--
Ann, gardening in Zone 6a
South of Boston, Massachusetts
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expounded:

a
In case you missed this recently I will repost as I see no reason to reinvent the wheel.
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/rec.gardens/msg/2f4308be59adc334?hl=en
"Oh my god, I haven't been on here for years. I scan down, open a post and its Ann from Massachusetts. It must be 4 or 5 years since I stopped by here and you are still at it, being a nasty, know it all bitch. I would have thought a house would have fallen on you by now. Must be a very sad life you have lead."
I would just add that for someone who claims that nothing is any of her business, you sure have a way of getting into everyone's business. Oh, and look out for falling houses, it's tornado season.
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Figures you'd enjoy a troll post. Find all those bitchy posts from me. Oh, I guess because you and I have opposite views on politics that means I'm a bitch. Ok. I can live with it. You are the one that has to live with your hostility. I could feel sorry for you, but I won't.

I see. So, you can express your opinions, but I can't. Get over yourself.
--
Ann, gardening in Zone 6a
South of Boston, Massachusetts
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expounded:

and
very
and
You might sign-up for one of these weather alert services. That way you will know when houses are likely to be coming your way.
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Years ago I was startled when a Swiss girl of my acquaintance in NYC told me that she hoped to move to the US. When I asked why, she said, "In Switzerland, everyone is in your business - it is quite normal for every one of your neighbors to feel that it is their right and their duty to come over to your house and tell you that your yard has too many weeds, your front stoop and sidewalks need sweeping, you have to put flowers in your flowerboxes, etc..... in America, I don't think people do that". It seems that in many crowded lands (the Netherlands, Switzerland, Japan) - there is tremendous social pressure to maintain appearances, and shame is used as a weapon to keep people in line. However, the US, which was always laissez faire in the past, partly because of its enormous size and the distance of one neighbor from another, is rapidly becoming a crowded country too, especially in certain regions. I think the tremendous energy this thread has generated is a reflection of a change in attitude. People are recognizing on a subconcious level that some of the freedoms (e.g. the freedom to be eccentric) that are possible when people are spread out, start to become problematic when people are in close proximity. Because we are a legalistic nation, I imagine that over time zoning regulations will take the place that shame has in other cultures. But all of that is going to arouse resentment, because it's a change from the values we were raised with.
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You're right, Presley, however, there are still plenty of places where you can live without too much interference from others.
Thing is, the people who want to control move into an area and then try to enact their controls. VH hopes a pig farm would open near me. More the point, if I chose to move in next to a pig farm, I wouldn't start trying to change the laws nearby to outlaw the pig farm. We have that happen around here all the time. VH would move next door and spend the rest of her life fighting the pig farm and drive the farmer out of business.
There's a family who have owned a farm for generations in Scituate, it's now a retail nursery. Someone bought the land on the hill above them (it has ocean views) and built several large homes. The people who moved in directly behind the farm didn't like seeing the nursery operations while they gazed at their view. They tried their damnedest to shut them down. Thankfully there are enough people around here to see their property rights eaten up at town meetings thatthey voted these idiots down. They bought their $800,000 house knowing full well the nursery was there. Tough luck for them.
Yes, as things get more crowded some of this will happen. The towns around here pretty much recognize that people buy here because it's small-town New England, and with that come farms, animals, etc. The townies rightfully resent the newcomers who try to change the rules to citify things. If you don't like what goes on in an area, then don't move there. Stick to a nice, governed subdivision and leave the rest of us alone.
--
Ann, gardening in Zone 6a
South of Boston, Massachusetts
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fewer & fewer, and mostly in the less temperate areas like Maine or upstate NY (fortunately i enjoy large quantities of snow<g>)

which is why "right to farm" laws have had to be enacted. when i decide to sell & move again, i will specificly be looking for a town /area with such laws in place. as Southern NH becomes more crowded with idiot suburbanites, i have to go through more trouble keeping my livestock... not that there is anything wrong with what i have for a setup, but "well-meaning" busybodies like to call animal control because "there's a dead llama in that yard" (um, no. he's sunbathing. he's perfectly healthy. if you actually *looked* you see ears twitching), or "there is no barn, poor animals". true, but there are 2 three sided shelters on the other side of the hill, but they can't be arsed to ask *me* about husbandry, oh no! they need to call SPCA or animal control... wastes everybody's time (actually, our animal control guy tends to dislike the idiots as much as i do, so he just gives a courtesy call & doesn't bother coming out now)

heh heh. i hate those people with a passion... money doesn't mean you have the right to get your way.

you might push for your town to look into right to farm laws. it's really doing a favor to the NIMBYs... most of them have no clue where thier food comes from. and go to the town meetings & selectmen's meetings. you have to be there to vote down the streetlights & sidewalks, the strip malls & big box stores the suburbanites *have* to have. if they needed them so bad, they should have stayed in the city! lee BTW, China has surpassed the US in meat production. i dunno about you, but i don't want to eat any meat raised in China! i'll keep my own steers.
--
war is peace
freedom is slavery
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me
one
over
is
has
on
legalistic
that
resentment,
That's very interesting. This discussion isn't new. It comes up on a regular basis. There seem to be two camps. Camp A: If I pay for XYZ then I have unlimited rights. Camp B: We are all interdependent. What you do has an impact on me and therefore I have the right to an opinion and in some cases a right to take action.
I agree with Victoria. The "Camp A" types are just people who haven't had their buttons pushed yet. Everyone has limits.
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Couldn't agree more. We had just such a situation in our neighborhood. Neighbor of junker got fed up with looking at the crud. Even tho it was in violation of city ordinances, the city only stopped the problem temporarily -- over and over again. The junker's neighbor got a low ball price for his home.
Anyone have any good solutions?
Suzy O
expounded:

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In some towns, you can actually speak to the town judge, outside of a courtroom setting. Push him/her to take the law to its most extreme conclusion, which MAY involve having the town remove the junk and place a lien on the neighbor's home. Some judges will also issue injunctions to force people to obey the law. That gives the cops the ability to take them away in handcuffs.
expounded:

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I wish.
Suzy O
expounded:

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You wish what?
expounded:

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What you said regarding backyard junkyard operations ...... " issue injunctions to force people to obey the law. That gives the cops the ability to take them away in handcuffs."
Suzy O
expounded:

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Oh...OK. I wanted to be sure, because wishing won't make it happen. Find out who your town justice is and try to set up a brief meeting. Sometimes those judges think they can only be seen in the courtroom, on their thrones, but there are some who'll talk with you outside of that setting and tell you how to proceed, in order to get a neighborhood bonehead INTO the courtroom.
expounded:

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expounded:

I've had the same thing (more than once).....luckily they come and go and I built a fence<G>.....Incidentally 5 years ago when I became very ill, life got just a little sidetracked as I nearly died with a very long recuperation.... I had no neighbors complaining about "my mess"......Rod
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