wimminz is ungreatful

I can't really justify that [dado set|jointer|router|digital camera] with all this medical debt heading my way, but I decided damn if I was going to just hand them every dime I have, wind up broke, and still end up owing them thousands besides. Might as well take care of some household stuff that needed doing while I could afford to do so. I guess this seed got planted when my dryer blew up last month.

I replaced our brain damaged thermostat with one of those newfangledy digital deals, which took care of one big annoyance. Next up, the hot water heater. I noticed that it had finally turned 30. It was still working, but after 30 years, I figured it was only a matter of time. The top has been crusty with rust for years now, and I've been kind of holding my breath every time I looked at it, hoping the tank wouldn't rust through before I could do something about it.

So I got a super deluxe ultra floofy top of the line replacement. The heater had a main shutoff, and one each for hot and cold coming off to feed the washer. None of these three valves worked, and one of them had a broken handle, and a horked up handle holding screw. So while I was going to be knee deep in a mess, I went ahead and re-did the whole works with new materials and new valves all around.

I spared no expense, and cut no corners. I took measurements, measured twice (measured twice incorrectly, as it turns out, but that's a different story), made a detailed drawing and an itemized purchase list. I got everything I needed, then spent six tedious hours painstakingly cutting and reaming and deburring and polishing and shining and spiffing and test fitting the crap out of everything, then I finally had it all together, hooked up, and pressure tested after the seventh hour. Another half hour or so, and I had carefully fitted insulation and taped all the joints, and had done the spiff damn biffiest job of installing a water heater anyone ever saw.

It was kind of a nice day today, coldish, but above freezing, and sunny. I wanted to spend some time outside, but I spent my entire Saturday working on this damn water heater. SWMBO, meanwhile, was with Mom all day, shopping and playing cards and stuff.

She came home, looked at my work, and had the audacity to bitch about the mess in the laundry room. I asked her what she thought of my eight hours of labor, and, for that matter, my $500, and she said, "Hrmph. It's a water heater. Does it work?"

SHEESH! That's why I say wimminz is ungreatful. She shouldda said "It's great honey. Nice job. Here, have a beer, then let's go back to the bedroom."

Instead, she went in the living room after a hard day of playing cards and shopping, and fell asleep on the couch. My Score Factor is a whopping 0, and I had to get my own beer. Sniff.

Oh, and I have a headache too. Hrmph.

Reply to
Silvan
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-------------- Show the work to one of your buddies who'll appreciate it.

Reply to
Abe

I'm not exactly sure that Silvan really wants the kind of appreciation he was looking for from SWMBO from one of his buddies.

+--------------------------------------------------------------------------------+ The absence of accidents does not mean the presence of safety Army General Richard Cody +--------------------------------------------------------------------------------+
Reply to
Mark & Juanita

Our hot water heater appears to be piling up as well. Sort of off & on whether or not it will fill the tub with hot. Seeing as I won't be home for another month or so, would you mind going to my place & putting one in there? I'll make sure that SWMBO brings you lots of beer, and she'll clean up all the mess. As far as the bedroom part goes, you may have to take care of that yourself.

P.

Reply to
Paul in MN

Yeah, but he won't suggest going back to the bedroom. (I hope)

;-) Glen

Reply to
Glen

One should never do home handyman items without the significant other at home and somewhat, if only lightly involved (cleanup, painting, etc), ESPECIALLY if they made the job suggestion. Always let them see you sweat. Most women who do not do their own repairs do not seem to appreciate any efforts that they do not directly witness, or that they are not involved in. I'm off on Fridays and weekends, and I make damn sure that I spend Friday like I want to, then do the handy stuff on weekends so she will see what's involved, all the while commenting on how much money those tools and I are saving us along the way. My handyman co-worker confided that he had also adopted this method, after not feeling appreciated for his efforts and savings. OTOH, I am also very willing to wash dishes and clean up when she cooks up a good meal. It's only fair.

RJ

Reply to
Backlash

It's all about balance. You did the right thing.

I feel for you. I was informed yesterday that fixing the downstairs toilet is "man's work." Is that so? (I don't remember clogging the thing.) Okay, how would a man do it? I think I'll be needing one of those underwater camera snakes for this job. And maybe a pump; I used a sponge last time and it took whole minutes to empty the tank. Life is too short.

My wife will likely never build anything in the sense of what we mean by the word "build" around here. I have to content myself with the odd positive remark, and play a numbers game. Ignore the bad stuff as best I can, and keep the projects coming so my chances of getting a good one increase. It's going to take awhile for your water heater day to stop smarting, but it will. Get busy with the next thing as soon as you can.

FWIW, I think you did a great job on your water heater!

- Owen -

Reply to
Owen Lawrence

Business of having her "help" to impress her with the labor involved is a mixed blessing at best. Saves time to do it yourself, in many cases, and I find I get better rewards for service when she's not "tired" from standing around handing and/or making four trips to the shop (~25') to get a tack hammer.

1) Empty-handed. "I don't know where you keep your damned hammers." 2) With the 20 oz roughing hammer. "There's so many of them on that board, how should I know? I'm not a mind-reader." 3) With a mallet. "Well, you said it didn't have a forked thingie on the other end." 4) With a tack hammer (one of two on the board). "Next time why don't you just get it yourself."

Indeed.

Ask her to bake cookies or something while you're working, putting in an appearance or two complete with sighs and grasps at the back. Refuse offers of help - you know where that leads - and ask if you can sample the cookies when they're cool.

When she comes out with the cookies, show her what you've been doing, and remind her that you make lousy cookies.

Now she's not tired, her ego has been stroked with the cookie praise, and she's not seething over being loudly informed for the 466,788th time how to tell a 3/8 combination wrench from a 9/16 - "Keeeeerist, woman, it's written on the side of the thing" - so you've got a chance. May not be gratitude, but I'll settle.

Reply to
George

Silvan wrote in news: snipped-for-privacy@adelphia.com:

The key learning I picked up was that, with her gone for the 'project period', she missed the impact of 'no water' and/or 'no hot water', for the eight hours. Also missed the requisite three trips to the hardware store and/or plumbing supplier. Also missed the minor first aid portions of 'This Old House' out-takes.

To the uninitiated, all you did was play in the basement all day. And left a mess in the laundry room. She had hot water when she left, and when she returned. What was it you did? And you spent how much to do it?

BTW, given the choice, in my world, eight hours of plumbing work is a much preferable choice to 8 hours with the in-laws.

Life isn't fair. But then, you probably figured that part out long ago.

Patriarch, who NEVER does plumbing without someone there to at least call the paramedics.

Reply to
Patriarch

Sat, Feb 19, 2005, 10:53pm snipped-for-privacy@users.sourceforge.net (Silvan) claims: Next up, the hot water heater. I noticed that it had finally turned 30. It was still working, but after 30 years, I figured it was only a matter of time. The top has been crusty with rust for years now, and I've been kind of holding my breath every time I looked at it, hoping the tank wouldn't rust through before I could do something about it. So I got a super deluxe ultra floofy top of the line replacement.

You mighta jumped the gun. From what I understand, the tank itself is glass-lined. Should be no problem, as long as the glass isn't cracked. The outer shell, is just that, a metal shell over insulation. Mine is around 24 year old, and has quite on me I think 3 times. Solution, get a new neater element, around $17 at Ace. First time went to a plumber supply store, then found Ace had the same thing, cheaper. Turn off the water and electric, drann the tank, unhook and unscrew the bad element, screw in and hook up the new, turn the electric and water back on, and viola, good for a few more years. All in about an hour, or less, minus travel time. Ah, yes, you also need a special wrench to unscrew the element, available at Ace, for around $5-7. If I ever buy any stock, I think I'll get some Ace stock.

A few months back, did notice one of the water valves on top was leaking. I got the parts, around $25, including PVC glue and PVC cutter, and the younger kid had it a new valve on inside of an hour, minus travel time. No prob.

I've since learned, that almost every hot water tank that's tossed, would have been fine, with just replacing the heater element.

JOAT Intellectual brilliance is no guarantee against being dead wrong.

- David Fasold

Reply to
J T

So what do expect from a gender that will spend their last $50 on a $25 item that was *supposedly* marked down from $75, and gloat, while flat broke, on how much they "saved"?

Mine is ostensibly appreciative of the things I do around the house, but the reason ain't exactly flattering. It dawned on me years ago that what I save by doing so just means to her that she has suddenly been presented with the opportunity to "save" by having more to "spend" on sales/bargains.

That's gratitude, right?

Reply to
Swingman

snipped-for-privacy@webtv.net (J T) wrote in news:10490-4218F5C6-47@storefull-

3158.bay.webtv.net:

I have a gas-fired heater. How do I replace the element?

Reply to
Han

All my buddies live between 80 and 6,000 miles away, on the other end of a glass screen.

Reply to
Silvan

well we all want you to know that that was a very thoughtful thing you did getting the water heater taken care of while your wife was out, and that of course it was a heckofa lot of work and it's unfortunate that your wife didn't appreciate it and absolutely you deserve to be dragged screaming into the bedroom and done whatever you two like to do there and we're sorry about the skinned knuckles and the hole in your new pants from where the solder landed on it and how it took seventy-billion trips to the stupid store and all of the mess in the laundry room that she so unfairly blames on you and all.

oh, and how's the headache doing?

Reply to
bridger

Did I give out those details? I don't remember if I mentioned the three trips or finding out why they're called "needle files" or not.

Preferable to ONE hour with the in-laws. :) (Or ten minutes.)

Um... I'm having trouble figuring out what was THAT dangerous.

Reply to
Silvan

Yeah, I get where you're coming from. It might not have worked either way though. Why should she have to slave over a hot stove all day to bake cookies -or- "help" me on the job when she has the option to go next door and spend all day goofing off?

Reply to
Silvan

Yeah, I like how this works too. "We're liberated. Its' the 20th/21st century, and we can do everything we want!" That means, to borrow an example from another post, that baking cookies is no longer "woman's work." But it still means changing the oil or fixing stuff like this, or digging the Hot Wheels car out of the brown end of the toilet is "man's work."

We're getting gypped on this whole women's lib thing, brothers. Our kids too. It's OK for girls to be empowered and to play with GI Joe, but if your little boy takes an interest in Barbie, SWMBO says noooooo way. (Of course noooo way I'm going to let the boy play with Barbie either, unless maybe he's "inspecting" her, but that's beside the point. :)

(I wonder how many youngsters are surprised when they get with their first nekkit woman and learn that they don't have a formless void in that area. :)

(Uh... Not that I know what Barbie looks like nekkit. This is, uh, just something I've heard.)

Aw, it doesn't smart. I'm used to it. I was mostly just bitching for comedic effect.

Thank you.

Reply to
Silvan

Hee. Cooks a good meal? I guess I'm let out of the dish washing thing indefinitely then. :)

Reply to
Silvan

Nah, there's more to it than that. Black soot trails leading out of the electrical box, and the metal all around the elements had that "I'm going to rust through any day now" look. They *do* rust through eventually. I had one in the last rental property I lived in that sprung a leak in the same general place, and started dripping water right on hot wires.

The top really was all to hell too. No parts from Ace could have fixed that if (when) it started leaking. The steel that the copper screws onto was so far gone that it would have turned to dust if I tried to get those connections apart.

If I get bothered, I'll throw some pictures up. I'm not going to go take any right at the moment because it's pouring rain and dark where the old heater is.

Reply to
Silvan

Nope. No solder in pants. No visible or obvious solder burns either, I don't think. I even had enough sense to cover the plastic electrical box on top of the thing before beginning work, so I have no solder blobs welded into that either. Quality work. :)

Only three. Once to buy the heater, once to buy all the parts I needed after carefully reading its manual, then once more to buy the right size hookup pipes because the parts I bought said they were something that they weren't. Not really my fault. "Works for all hot water heaters." It says that right here in black and white. Sigh.

The beer made it worse, the sleep made it better, the fact that I'm moments away from having to get back to the dreary business of whoring myself out to keep the paychecks flowing in has gotten it stirred up again.

Reply to
Silvan

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