My tradition, even years before I was married into one of the 12 tribes, has been Chinese food and a movie....and of course, crankin' the Streisand. (Don't tell anyone she borrowed her sound from Barbara Cook, a goya, and in TO, the crowds are only about half Jewish, the rest is Chinese.)
Wondering what the rest are going to do.
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----------------------------------------------- On Christmas Eve, The Gentiles gather Around the Christmas Tree They stay at home, and party with Their Goyishe family
They disappear one day each year And pass the egg nog 'round But it's all right Because that's the night The Jews control the town
Well, this happens every year on Christmas Eve All the happy Christian people take their leave Yeah, the streets are deserted and that's big news It's Christmas Time for the Jews
The holiday party starts about 6pm Ain't nobody recreating Bethlehem Yeah the Three Wise Men, that's a big old snooze It's Christmas Time for the Jews
They can finally see King Kong without waiting in line They can eat in Chinatown and drink their sweet ass wine They can crank Barbra Streisand on the streets they cruise It's Christmas Time for the Jews
They can gang up on the Quakers Play for the Lakers They can do what they wanna Even blow off Madonna Get a chance to drive a tractor Win on Fear Factor See Fiddler On The Roof with actual Jewish actors
Now, they really get the party goin' after dark Circumcizing grateful squirrels in the city park Picking fights in the bar knowing they can't lose It's Christmas Time for the Jews
Now it's nearly 10:30 Yes, it's time for bed Daily Show reruns dancin' in their heads Maybe next year they'll learn how to hold their booze It's Christmas Time for the Jews