OT: Murphy's other laws

MURPHY'S OTHER 15 LAWS 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 3. He who laughs last, thinks slowest. 4. A day without sunshine is like, well, night. 5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't. 7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. 8. The 50-50-90 Rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. 9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone from Alberta would be stupid enough to try to pass them. 10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. 11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first. 12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. 13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries. 14. God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark. 15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
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"Gramp's shop" wrote in message
MURPHY'S OTHER 15 LAWS
12. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.
12a. Build a man a fire and you warm him for a day. Set a man on fire and you warm him for the rest of his life.
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On Sun, 21 Apr 2013 07:58:55 -0700 (PDT), "Gramp's shop"

At the Liars Club convention, they had a contest to see who could tell the biggest whopper. One after another got up and told elaborate stores. Finally, the last guy got on the stage and said, "I have at home two adult children and a flashlight and they all work". First Prize.
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"Gramp's shop" wrote:

<snip>
16. Mother Nature is a bitch.
Lew
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On Sunday, April 21, 2013 6:06:01 PM UTC-5, Lew Hodgett wrote:

The one I really like: The odds of a piece of buttered bread falling butter-side-down increase with the value of the carpeting.
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Personally, I like Man plans and God laughs
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Murphy was an optimist.
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Dave Balderstone wrote:

Well, at least glasses will keep ya from getting a poke in the eye! ; )
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On Sun, 21 Apr 2013 07:58:55 -0700 (PDT), "Gramp's shop"

Things get tough under pressure.
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