SUM PERCH!

[Steve B]

The other day I felt energetic. I also felt claustrophobic, that feeling you get just before you pass out from lack of oxygen ............... I had to take stuff to the dump.

Anyhoo, I took stuff to the dump. Included was a piece of black carpet that had been laying around forever. I felt gratification, satisfaction, and nearly an orgasm as I tossed things that had tripped me, sat around forever, and just disorganized my life. GOOD RIDDANCE.

Fast forward.

I went quail hunting for the last couple of days. After I got home, I went to wrenching on the ATV and checking things. I decided I needed a piece of carpet in the bottom of my hard box to keep things from bouncing.

ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

It's at the dump.

Why is it that when you take stuff to the dump, you need it within a few days?

This is about the sixty third time this has happened.

How do they know?

Steve

[W Canaday]

Yesterday I couldn't find my finishing nails so I bought a sampler package at the nearest 'dollar store'.

Worked like a charm!

As for the carpet, drive around your neighborhood next trash day. Or drive to the dump and catch someone off-loading their toolbox liner. ;-)

Bill

[Morris Dovey]

| my friends, I beat my addiction and life is grand.

Good evening. My name is Morris and I haven't saved a coffee can now for four days...

-- Morris Dovey DeSoto Solar DeSoto, Iowa USA

[Oleg Lego]

The Steve B entity posted thusly:

It is always a mistake to allow any inanimate object know (or guess) your intentions.

[jo4hn]

Google "murphy's law" and pay attention to its four zillion corollaries. It's gospel truth. whine, jo4hn

[Norman D. Crow]

It's JUNK until 2 days after you take it to the dump!

[J T]

Sun, Jan 8, 2006, 1:40am (EST+5) [e-mail] (Joe=A0Barta) who has failed life's test wrote: I'll tell you a little story. into the trash bag in the trash it goes. Ok, I'm done now, sorry.

Boy, we sure can't trust you, can we? You goofed. Big time. What you should have done - pack each can with sawdust. Then, seel them to people to carry in their vehicle, so they can sprinkle some when they need traction in snow - or on ice. That serves three purposes - gets rid of the extra cans, gets rid of your sawdust, brings in extra money. If you happen to be somewhere with no snow (like Californery or Florida, then move to some other state, snowy or not), then you ship the filled cans to some place with snow, they you charge extra, because it's imported. You can even spray paint the cans, then put your own abel on them, and charge even more.

Never, ever, listen to anyone telling you to get rid of anything. You'll lose in the end if you do. Now someone else, with a large stock of coffee cans, is bound to read this, and get the jump on you, thereby preventing you from making a fortune.

JOAT You'll never get anywhere if you believe what you "hear". What do you "know"?

- Granny Weatherwax