I was in a Tractor Supply [for the first time] today and there on
their book/magazine rack was a thin, hardcover book "Outhouses" by a
Holly Bollinger. Mostly pictures but some real unusual styles. FWIW.
Steve B (in nKZeg.98039$iU2.96066@fed1read01) said:
| I need to build an outhouse at my cabin for winter use when the
| water is shut off.
| I want to put up some kooky things, and make it a real interesting
| outhouse. I have thought of things like TV antenna, satellite dish,
| gun rack, and many things.
| What joke items would you put on it?
| What practical useful things would you put in?
Catalogs and corn cobs are for sissies.
Hang up a roll of this stuff:
DeSoto, Iowa USA
Well if you want to show that you are well off you should make it a
"two-holer" - then you and the wife can use it at the same time. . .
Having the door cut so you can open the top half and enjoy the view while
the bottom part is closed shows class too. . .
That keeper is going to the file. I had a suggestion that we put a window
in the top half of a one part door. But I like your Dutch door idea better.
I just had the thought of making a divider between the two holes, and
putting two pieces of screen with a gauzy cloth between them like a Catholic
confessional. So the two could talk, but have privacy.
You could always add a nice seat....some horror inspiring thing....
Splinters, rusty nails....that sort of thing.
Another nice touch would be sign with "Please DO NOT feed snakes, mice,
or other micellaneous visitors".
Run an underground cable to supply enough power for a small light so you can
find the TP in the dark -- you may not want to turn it on for long in summer
as the mosquitoes will find you faster. It may also be useable for a small
heater for winter, just to make life a little bit more comfortable. Possibly
with a switch in the cabin to pre-heat the privy. All that means you need to
weather-strip the door and have any openings closable to keep the heat in.
On second thought, why not an AC for summer use, controlled the same as the
I recall reading when I lived in Arizona that, historically, the majority of
serious/fatal black widow bites occurred in the early years of settlement
and resulted from the spiders' fondness for spinning their webs on the
cool,dark underside of outhouse seats (and, of course, the lack of access to
advanced medical care). Need for caution still pertains:
I'll leave the design of a suitable 'spider evicter' as an exercise for the
interested reader :-)
- make it a 2-holer and tell people that there is a hole for each leg
and a nice clean board to poop on.
- add plastic spiders on the boards
- no toilet seat, just the holes
- Sears catalog for those 'oops' moments
- a few dried corn cobs on the side too
- the infamous half moon cut into the door
- leave it tilted to one side just for grins
- beware of snakes and alligators sign
- maybe even a little piped in music of farts or jungle animals or
- cold wet spagetti on the floor (worms)
- you might even add a little water spigot under the boards and give the
'guest' an occasional shot of cold water from afar on their butts from
time to time - or a small blast of air.
Ahhhhh, the things we did when we were kids to outhouses................
Steve B wrote:
A brick exterior. To be really classy, you use curved bricks and make a
'Walnut paneling' for the interior -- some of that fake Masonite stuff. (It's
comparatively inexpensive, and the 'picture of wood' side is impervious to
A dummy security camera, and a "smile, you're on Candid Camera" sign.
Any of numerous things, (delayed-action) activated by the closing of the
A fake door on an inside wall, labelled "Jacuzzi".
A trap-door in the floor, labelled "Wine cellar".
If it's on skids/runners -- so you just dig a new hole and move it, when
it gets 'full' -- a steering-wheel in front of one of the seats. Which
also leads to the possibility of tarting-up the exterior like some of the
The obvious -- a roll of TP.
The not-so-obvious -- *another* roll of TP. You *will* discover that the
first one runs out at a _most_ inopportune time.
It's a whole lot easier to use at night, if there is at least 'minimal'
lighting available in situ.
Switchable heater and/or fan is not a bad idea, either.
Something to use as an 'emergency raincoat' -- again, sooner or later, you
will get caught out there by a downpour.
Aerosol air freshener.
email@example.com (Robert Bonomi) wrote:
[snippage of some wonderful ideas]
a velvet Elvis painting... or those dogs playing pool/cards.
a plastic 'wrought iron' torch.. with one of those electric flat
filament 'flicker' bulbs?
A Red Green bobble head.
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