Guy was an average player.
One day, he hit his T-Shot on the 2nd hole about 200 yards and sliced
it into the woods.
Went into the woods looking for his ball and found it under a Lilly
pad, right next to a Wee person who was resting there.
The Wee person said, Ye found me and if ye let me go, I'll grant you a
The golfer thought for a moment and then said, "I'd like to be a
The Wee person said, "I can do that but it will impact your sex life."
The golfer said, "That's OK, I want to be a scratch golfer."
The Wee person granted his wish, and for the next couple of years the
golfer played fantastic golf.
One day he was playing at the same course where he met the Wee person,
and once again he hit his T-Shot on the 2nd hole about 200 yards and
sliced it into the woods.
First time he had hit a bad shot since the last time he played this hole.
Went into the woods looking for his ball and once again found it under
a Lilly pad, right next to the same Wee person who was resting there.
The Wee person said, "I remember you, I granted you a wish to be a
scratch golfer, but told you it would affect your sex life."
The Wee person said, "So how are things going?"
The golfer said, "Playing great golf, this is the first bad shot I've
hit since I last saw you."
The Wee person said, "And how is your sex life?"
The golfer said, "Once, maybe twice a month. Not to bad for a priest
in a small parish."
Guy drives onto a bridge, stops his car in the middle, gets out of
his car, and climbs up on the guard rail.
An old lady was standing there and asks him, "What's wrong?".
The guy says, "My wife just left me, my mortgage is due and I'm
broke, and I stole $1,000,000 from my work and lost it all on the
horses, so I'm going to Kill myslef".
The old lady says, "I'm a witch, you come home with me tonight and
have sex with me all night long and I'll have your wife back home, your
mortgage paid in ful, and all the money paid back"".
So the guy goes home with her and has sex with her all night, then
passes out. He wakes up and the old lady is leaning on one elbow
staring at him, and she asks him, "How od are you". The guy says, "I'm
37". The old lady says, "Aren't you pretty old to still believe in
Only those who have the patience to do simple things perfectly will
acquire the skill to do difficult things easily.
- Johann Von Schiller