OT-Humor for our Southern friends

[Bob Schmall]

A very genteel Southern Lady was driving across the Savannah River Bridge in Georgia one day. As she neared the top of the bridge, she noticed a young man fixing to jump. She stopped her car, rolled down the window and said, "Please don't jump, think of your dear mother and father."

He replied, "Mom and Dad are both dead; I'm going to jump."

She said, "Well, think of your wife and children."

He replied, "I'm not married and I don't have any kids."

She said, "Well, think of Robert E. Lee."

He replied, ''Who's Robert E. Lee?''

She replied, ''Well, just go ahead and jump, you dumb ass Yankee."

[jo4hn]

And they just lost 2 of 3 to the Angels...

[Fly-by-Night CC]

I was walking across a bridge one day, and I saw a man standing on the edge, about to jump off. So I ran over and said "Stop! don't do it!"

"Why shouldn't I?" he said.

I said, "Well, there's so much to live for!"

He said, "Like what?"

I said, "Well...are you religious or atheist?"

He said, "Religious."

I said, "Me too! Are you Christian or Buddhist?"

He said, "Christian."

I said, "Me too! Are you Catholic or Protestant?"

He said, "Protestant." I said, "Me too! Are you Episcopalian or Baptist?"

He said, "Baptist!"

I said, "Wow! Me too! Are you Baptist Church of God or Baptist Church of the Lord?"

He said, "Baptist Church of God!"

I said, "Me too! Are you Original Baptist Church of God, or are you Reformed Baptist Church of God?"

He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God!"

I said, "Me too! Are you Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of

1879, or Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915?"

He said, "Reformed Baptist Church of God, Reformation of 1915!"

I said, "Die, heretic scum", and pushed him off.

(Courtesy of Emo Philips)

[LRod]

That was great. I just sent it off to my daughter-in-law, whose father is a Baptist minister. Don't ask.

[Mark Cooper]

Great one!

Reminds me of...

A southern woman is attending a women's convention by herself, and walks up to a group of women to introduce herself.

"Hi, I'm Mary from Alabama. Where're y'all from?"

Turns out she's addressing a group of yankee women, one of which replies, "We are from a place where we do not end our sentences in prepositions."

Without missing a beat, Mary replies, "Oh me oh my, pardon my grammar! Where were my manners?! Where're y'all from......bitch?"

[Dan Valleskey]

I like your sig line!