O/T: Love This Phone Call

Aug 25, 2011 18 Replies

Enjoy



Lew



----------------------------------------



**Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg,**
>
> **'Hello?'**
>
> **'Hi honey.**
>
> **This is Daddy.**
>
> **Is Mommy near the phone?'**
>
> **'No, Daddy.**
>
> **She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.'**
>
> **After a brief pause,**
>
> **Daddy says,**
>
> **'But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul.'**
>
> **'Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy,**
>
> **Right now.'**
>
> Brief Pause.
>
> **'Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do.**
>
> **Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs**
>
> **And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy**
>
> **That Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway.'**
>
> **'Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.'**
>
> **A few minutes later**
>
> **The little girl comes back to the phone.**
>
> **'I did it, Daddy.'**
>
> **'And what happened, honey?' **
>
> 'Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes**
> **on and ran around screaming.**
>
> **Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser**
>
> **And now she isn't moving at all!'**
>
> **'Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?'**
>
> **'He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too.**
>
> **He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window**
>
> **And into the swimming pool.**
> **But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water**
> **Last week to clean it.**
>
> **He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead.'**
>
> *****Long Pause*****
>
> *****Longer Pause*****
>
> *****Even Longer Pause*****
>
> **Then Daddy says,**
>
> **'Swimming pool? .............**
>
> **Is this 486-5731?'*
>
> *
No, I think you have the wrong number.........
O

Got a good laugh out of that one.

Paul T.

Old One...

But still a darn good laugh.

...

Now let's try for one tha'ts ON TOPIC! Save the jokes & similar crap for your relatives and friends!

------------------------------------- Still suffering from advanced analitis I see.

Maybe performing aerial intercourse on a rotating annular spheroid is more your speed?

Try it.

Lew

.

You are a fine example of cranial rectal insertion.

On Thu, 25 Aug 2011 15:49:56 -0400, FrozenNorth

New Net Cop. Give him a chance to make a fool of himself a little bit longer. New net cops are always good for a laugh.

Hah, you spelt netkop wrong. :-)

On Thu, 25 Aug 2011 16:15:50 -0400, FrozenNorth

I'm so ashamed. Forgive me please.

(Psst. Should this conversation be labelled O/T? I don't want Twayne coming after me.)

---------------------------------- No guts, no blue chips.

Lew

That is funny. Reminds me of this

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't know if it was staged or really happened though.

How about you hang around for a few years and get the feel of the group before you start playing net-nanny.

------------------------------ Remember Balderstone's piece on anger management?

Lew

"Twayne" wrote in news:j361o9$7dm$1@dont- email.me:

Got any good woodworking jokes?

Puckdropper

Easier to bit-bucket yet another bozo.

-- Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens. -- Jimi Hendrix

Everyone here IS a friend.

Well, mostly everyone. There's always an exception.

A Chinese woodcarver noticed his supply of expensive woods was diminishing. Upon further investigation, he noticed small footprints in the floor's sawdust.

The woodcarver decided to catch the thief by hiding in his shop during the night.

Sure enough, that very evening he heard a disturbance in the shop. The woodcarver jumped from his hiding place and switched on the lights. To his amazement, he saw a 7-foot BEAR with itty-bitty feet!

Thinking quickly, the woodcarver cried out: "Ah ha! I've caught you, boy-foot bear with teak of Chan!"

I believe it's to suggest that someone "engage in aeronautical intercourse with a transversing to toroid"

which works out to be the same as "take a flying F at a rolling dount"

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