Laminate flooring accident

A neighbour sent me a text saying this morning saying "I have chopped my finger off laying some laminate. The key is under the plantpot feed the cat until further notice please"

I have fed the cat but I have no idea how or what me managed to chop his finger off with. I also wonder what he used to type the text message with.

Adam

Reply to
ARWadworth
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Ah - a digital communication. :-)

Reply to
Rod

Thumbs are normally used for text messages, are they not?

Reply to
Paul Matthews

Probably gone to A&E for a sore nose?

Reply to
George

I always find clipping my fingernails invariably clears up my ear infection

Reply to
Graham.

Analog communication

formatting link

Reply to
Graham.

Perhaps s/he was was the person asking about a new Stanley knife a couple of days ago.

Reply to
Graham.

I have bought 10 false fingers from the fancy dress shop. I have put them in drawers and cupboards in his house with labels on such as "pull your finger out", "that is a sore point", "Winston Churchill needed 2 of these"

I need more ideas before he comes home.

Adam

Reply to
ARWadworth

I have eight fingers and two thumbs...are you sure you have ten?

You need this to hold a wedding ring.

Reply to
George

I am divorced. I did it DIY for £375

Adam

Reply to
ARWadworth

Not sure if I dare say it, you tried vinegar for that?

Reply to
Rod

With or without the brown paper?

The 2nd para of that site has a problem in IE6

Locorten Vioform does the trick if it gets bad enough for a GPs script.

Reply to
Graham.

My English teacher used to shout "extractum digitum", that is when he wasn't beating our arses with anything that came to hand.

Reply to
Graham.

Perhaps he used his Dictaphone.

Reply to
The Medway Handyman

A nurse phoned me about 20 minutes ago to tell me about my neighbour. I tried every trick in the book but I failed to get her phone no.

That is the credit crunch for you. Nurses are more picky about blokes now as they (the female ones)sill have job security.

Adam

Reply to
ARWadworth

Odd - I hadn't looked at it in IE at all, but you are right. Oh well, there is a PDF version.

I happened across that a couple of years ago and always wondered if it worked. I never get ear infections - plenty of other ear`things. :-)

Reply to
Rod

Leave 3/4 of a Kitkat somewhere? Insert Joan Collins comment as needed/desired.

Reply to
Rod

I hear Miss Collins requires all four, but I haven't got first hand knowledge.

Reply to
Graham.

messagenews:0Aeuk.50156$ snipped-for-privacy@text.news.virginmedia.com...

So how *did* he digitize himself ? Simon.

Reply to
sm_jamieson

That's clumsy. Easy to do with a chop saw though, i'd have thought. I tend to keep my fingers out of spinny bits.

P.

Reply to
zymurgy

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