I have just had an altercation with a bloke in charge of a portable speed sign. The type that light up and "show" your speed and then either give a happy or sad face.
It showed me as doing 32 MPH and so I pulled up to have a word with the bloke operating the device.
Me "Is this device calibrated because it has just shown me as doing
32MPH, my speedo said 27MPH and my satnav said 25MPH"
Him" Yes, so you were obviously speeding"
"Got any proof it's working correctly"
"No"
"Care to jump into my car (the van has broken down again) and drive toward your sign to confirm my evidence?"
"No I cannot get into your car you might be a pervert"
"I am a pervert but I am not going to bum you, I am just going to prove that your machine is wrong"
"I am sorry I did not mean to call you a pervert"
"You did not call me a pervert, you alleged that I could be a pervert. I am a pervert so free to call me one"
"That would not be correct"
"Oh but I am a pervert, and you can call me one if you want I will not object"
"I don't want to"
"But you were happy to allege that I was a pervert before I told you I actually was one"
"I'm calling the police you are scaring me"
"Do what you f****ng want, just make sure that you get their speed when they arrive in three weeks time, it will give you something to have a wank over later".
Made my day.
"