O/T: Old Farts Part II

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(This is supposedly a true account recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota Florida)
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, fuond four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle.
She dropped her shoppingbags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of her lung, “I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the car!”
The four men didn’t wait for asecond threat. They got out and ran like mad.
The lady, somewhat shaken, then proceeded to load her shopping bags int the back of the car and got into the driver’s seat. She was so shaken that she could not get her key into the ignition.
She tried and tried, and then she realized why. It ws for the same reason she had wondered why there was a football, a Frisbee and two 12-packs of beer in the front seat.
A few minutes later, she found her won car parked four or five spaces further down.
She loaded her bags into the car and drove to the nearest police station to report her mistake.
The sergeant to who she told the story couldn’t stop laughing.
He pointed to the other end of the counter, where four pale men were reporting a car jacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.
No charges were filed.
Moral of the story?
If you’re going to have a senior moment . . . Make it memorable.
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Snip

Many years ago my grand mother came to town to visit. She lived in a tiny town of about 500. She and my mother went grocery shopping. My grand mother got tired and told my mother that she was going back to the car and would wait for her. You guessed it, my mother did not find my grand mother at the car but did find her several cars down in a "similar" car patiently waiting.
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On Sun, 13 Jan 2008 15:18:03 GMT, "Leon"

I very often drop my wife off at the door of the establishment she wishes to terrorize and park in some shady spot to wait for her. I once watched her come out of the place, walk to a similar looking vehicle as ours, open the door, and get in. I couldn't tell who was more surprised; her or the guy who was sitting in the driver's seat waiting for his wife.
Would that she only did it once...
--
LRod

Master Woodbutcher and seasoned termite
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Might have been a bigger surprise had both left. LOL
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LRod wrote:

One time I came out of the grocery store, unlocked a beige Volvo wagon, and put the key in the ignition. I was sitting there trying to figure out why the ignition wouldn't turn when someone knocked on the window.
Turns out that it wasn't _my_ beige Volvo wagon, it was someone else's and mine was several cars down. The weird thing is that my key unlocked the door but not the ignition.
--
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--John
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On Mon, 14 Jan 2008 09:31:40 -0500, "J. Clarke"

A coworker and I once discovered, at about the same time, that my Ford van and his Ford sedan were identically keyed. As controllers, we both worked rotating shifts, of course, and were on different crews, so it was not uncommon for one of us to come in for a later shift than the other for relief (figuratively, although sometimes actually, since we worked in the same area).
For a few weeks after our discovery, we would have to look all over the parking lot for our respective ride as it seemed hilarious to both of us to move the others' vehicle before clocking in. Of course it wasn't nearly as funny after a mid shift...
We tired of it after a while. After all, it wasn't that big a property. Besides, we weren't that stupid--if Mark came in on a shift after me, I knew I needn't bother heading to where I'd parked at the beginning of the shift.
--
LRod

Master Woodbutcher and seasoned termite
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I've had that same experience. Years ago, driving the family car to "Junior Achievement", I _inevitably_ ended up parked next to another guy in the company who's family had a virtually identical car. It didn't matter where we parked, or who got there first, practically every week we ended up side-by-side. With _poor_ lighting in the parking area. White 1967 Dodge "Coronet" sedans with a maroon interior. Again, the keys would open the door, but not work the ignition.
The first time I got into the "unstartable" car I began to figure it out when it penetrated that the odometer read wrong.
Both the other driver and I learned to pay _real_ close attention to the license plate numbers. (both plates were 5-digit numbers, 3 of which were matching, with the 4th being a 6 vs an 8.)
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Urban legand making the rounds again. See the following:
http://www.snopes.com/crime/justice/grannies.asp
Allen

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"Allen Roy" wrote:

Time to drag out Ripley's "Believe it or not" again.
Makes the perceived problem go away.
Lew
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http://www.snopes.com/crime/justice/grannies.asp
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It warms my heart to know that Mr. Devin stands on guard for me. Armed with the power of Snopes, he protects from that (heretofore unknown) evil side of the Internet.
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Robatoy said:

:-)
Greg G.
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It's a heavy burden, but one someone must bear. If we display gullibility by letting these urban myths go unchallenged, who knows, one day politicians might be tempted to be less than truthful with us, and imagine what a horrible world that would be. ;^)
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Indeed. Then the only way we could tell if one was lying would be to watch and see if his lips were moving.
--
FF


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Well THIS one's absolutely true - because I did it.
There's a little chinese take out place about a half mile from home. One rainy evening, after dusk, I stopped in on my way home to get some take out. My windshield defroster wasn't working well and the windshield was fogging up if I kept the windows up.
While waiting for my food I grabbed some napkins, got a cup of water and went out and cleaned the inside of my windshield in hopes that it would reduce the fogging problem.
Now if you've owned, or been in a Ford Aerostar, you know that it's quiet a reach to get ALL of the inside of the windshield - and the lighting wasn't that great, it being a rainy night.
Got the driver's side done and walked around to the passenger side to do that side of the windshield. Got in and found I was sitting on a backpack. I figured one of the kids I'd given a ride home from school had left their back pack.
Only when I had to move the little chinese lantern with the red silk fringe out of the way to clean the middle of the windshield - did I realize this wasn't my van. Hadn't even noticed that THIS aerostar didn't have the kayak roof rack that's on my van.
Went inside and laughingly told the owner about my OOPS! He went in the back, said something in chinese and at least two people in the kitchen started laughing their asses off - in chinese of course. When he returned, still laughing, he told me the cook thanks me for cleaning his windshield.
Every time I went into that place to get some food the owner would yell something in chinese and laughter from the back would follow.
I figure if it made someone smile, or laugh out loud, well sharing a screw up that does that sure beats the hell out of the ones that involve blood and/or bruises.
My name is charlie b and I approved this tale - which is, swear to god, true.
charlie b
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"charlieb" wrote

Used to have a passion, and, being relatively young, newly single, and just out of the service, the time, for steer roping.
AAMOF, had one of the best "heeling" horses around this part of the country, Rusty, who, being a King Ranch bred "Leo" offspring, had a number of almost identical cousins (Leo being known to "throw" his type, color and confirmation, one of the traits which made him a famous sire of cow saavy quarter horses).
Also had just bought a brand new "Barry Burke" roping saddle, the steer roping "pay once, cry once" equivalent of a Unisaw to a woodworker ... that saddle cost me a fortune (no telling how many horses I had to shoe to buy it, and being newly single of course, didn't have to justify to anyone ... ).
One Saturday night, the second of a two day rodeo, my roping partner (header) and I (heeler) drew to rope in the show instead of the after show "slack" we'd roped in the night before. Turns out that another cowboy from out of town also had a Leo bred "heading" horse, and, to complicate matters further, an identical, brand new, BB roping saddle.
Said combination he proceeded to park in the exact same spot on the fence I'd tied Rusty the night before.
Yep ... in the course of human failings, things have apparently stayed the same when it comes to getting in/on the wrong "ride".
To shorten the story considerably, I don't know who was more surprised that night; the horse - who'd never heeled a steer in his life; or me - when that big Mexican steer hit the end of the rope in a manner new and surprising to "Rusty", who promptly crow hopped twice and fell over sideways, still 'hard and fast' to the steer, in front of god and the crowd.
Took us 20 minutes to get that horse and steer loose of each other, and that brand new saddle (now well broke in) off him so he could get up, and another two weeks to get the red off my face ... they're probably still laughing in Bellville.
... and if DG can find that on snopes, this old fart will kiss his butt.
--
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"Swingman" told us the tale of the wrong ropin' horse

growing up. Good one swingman.
How did the owner of the "wrong" horse react to you making a public display of your "horse rustlin"?
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"Lee Michaels" wrote

At first, he was kinda unsure what to say/do. But, since I was bigger and meaner ( I was shoeing horses at the time and folks don't normally dis anyone who wrestles 1200 lb horses all day, every day, and for good reason), and, particularly when I told him I wouldn't charge him but 'going rate' for training/teaching his horse how to heel, he got over it pretty quick.
:)
--
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[snipped fabulous story about being able to laugh at yourself.]

Funny stuff, Swing.
Great visuals.
People who can laugh at themselves are rich.
r
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"Robatoy" wrote

Too damn bad you can't pay your property taxes with a smile!
... then again, it'd take a house full of comedy club patrons at full roar for these.
--
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