How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? . . . . Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
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13 years ago
OT: Light bulb
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13 years ago
Speaking of brightly colored tools, any JOAT sightings lately?
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13 years ago
OMG. What kind of glue are you using today :o)
Consider a respirator!
RonB
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13 years ago
Hey, I posted that one last week. Thief!
-- Invest in America: Buy a CONgresscritter today!
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13 years ago
Oh yeah??? Where? Huh? Huh? CITE!! :-)
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13 years ago
Good artists borrow. Great artists steal. For everyone else, there's copyright...
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13 years ago
I made a mistake. It was only a week ago when I wrote that. And it was on our sister group, RCM. Close, eh?
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in America: Buy a CONgresscritter today!
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13 years ago
How many Zen Buddhists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two. One to screw it in and one to not screw it in.
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13 years ago
How many psychiatrists to change a light bulb?
Just one, but the bulb has to really, really want to change.
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13 years ago
How many teamsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? . . . . .
12...you got a problem with that? R- Vote on answer
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13 years ago
How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, the trick is getting them inside.
basilisk
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13 years ago
How many Country & Western singer does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two. One to change the bulb, one to sing about how he's going to miss the old one.
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13 years ago
Q: What happens when you play a country and western record backwards?
A: Y'getcher girlfriend back. Y'getcher pickup truck back. Y'getcher hounddog back. Y'getcher horse back. And y'getcher six-gun back. (C&W's all about loss, pard.)
-- That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. -- Doris Lessing
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13 years ago
DO try and stay on subject, C-less, please. We are talking about light bulbs here. Besides, playing records backwards can fark up your needle.
*smirk*"turn me on deadman...turn me on deadman...."
How many JAPs (Jewish American Princesses) does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two.... One to mix the martinis, the other to call dad.
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13 years ago
uh-oh, here comes the PC sensitivity traing crowd.
basilisk
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13 years ago
training
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13 years ago
Only if they are **FULL** Jews and not just
"Jewish"
On Tue, 1 Mar 2011 08:16:33 -0800 (PST), Robatoy wrote: Two.... One to mix the martinis, the other to call dad.
How many JAPs (Jewish American Princesses) does it take to change a lightbulb?
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13 years ago
THAT's funny right there! I don't care who you are.
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13 years ago
That's not all you get back.
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?v=F85UTbBrD8MBACKWARDS by Rascal Flatts
I was sitting on a wooden stool In a barbecue joint in Tennessee When this old boy walked in And he sat right down next to me I could tell he'd been through some hard times There were tear stains on his old shirt And he said you wanna know what you get When you play a country song backwards
You get your house back You get your dog back You get your best friend Jack back You get your truck back You get your hair back Ya get your first and second wives back Your front porch swing Your pretty little thing Your bling bling bling and a diamond ring Your get your farm and the barn and the boat and the Harley First night in jail with Charlie Sounds a little crazy, a little scattered and absurd But that's what you get when you play a country song backwards Well I never heard it said quite like that It hit me in the face cause that's where I'm at I almost fell flat out on the floor He said wait a minute that's not all there's even more
You get your mind back you get your nerves back Your achey breaky heart back You get your pride back You get your life back You get your first real love back You get your big screen TV, a DVD and a washing machine You get the pond and the lawn And the rake and the mower You go back where you don't know her It sounds a little crazy a little scattered and absurd But that's what you get When you play a country song backwards Oh play that song Woo!!!
We sat there and talked about how it would be If we could turn it all around and and change this C-R-A-P
You get your house back You get your dog back You get your best friend Jack back You get your truck back You get your hair back Ya get your first and second wives back Your front porch swing Your pretty little thing Your bling bling bling and a diamond ring Your get your farm and the barn and the boat and the Harley First night in jail with Charlie You get your mind back you get your nerves back Your achey breaky heart back You get your pride back You get your life back You get your first real love back You get your big screen TV, a DVD and a washing machine You get the pond and the lawn And the rake and the mower You go back where you don't know her It sounds a little crazy a little scattered and absurd But that's what you get When you play a country song backwards
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13 years ago
Q: What did the JAP say when her boyfriend was making love to her? A: Beige. Yes, I'll paint the ceiling beige.
Q: How do you know when a JAP is having an orgasm? A: She drops her nail file.
...in the light bulb.
-- That is what learning is. You suddenly understand something you've understood all your life, but in a new way. -- Doris Lessing