Murphy is going to get you! (some wood content)

Murphy cannot be avoided, no matter how you try.

This morning I was donating platelets, which requires a fat needle in your vein for a couple of hours. I was just about finished and my book slipped on my lap. Unconsciously I started to grab for it with my left arm, which would have driven the needle through the vein, out the other side, and pain notwithstanding, would have produced a world-class bruise. But I outwitted Murphy and caught myself just in time.

Later I was pressure-washing the house in preparation for painting. I didn't get the "equipment protection" insurance, believing that's only for clumsy idiots, so I was being very careful not to drop the wand, and to keep the washer out of harms way. I was just finished with the upstairs portion of the house, and as I was preparing to step on to my ladder I noticed the moss on the roof. "I sure hope that isn't slippery", I thought, and gingerly tested it's friction with my foot. It wasn't slippery, so I stepped on the ladder. It, however, wasn't so firmly anchored, and down I went with a loud clatter, a sharp yell, and much "French" outburts. However, I was ok except for a couple of scrapes. My wife came running, and I assured her that I was alright, and then I noticed that my glasses were missing. Sure that they were broken, I found them under the ladder with a rung sitting between the lenses. The glasses were unhurt!

Finally, I finished up, feeling relieved that I had dodged at least two bullets today. I went out to the garage to grab a beer to put in the icebox. The cans were sitting on a loose six-pack of cola, and as I grabbed a beer can, the whole shebang went crashing down between the shelves, my wood scrap barrel, and my tablesaw. Sure that there would be a big, wet mess, I gingerly moved the scrap barrel, but none of the cans were punctured!

As I was replacing the cans, I noticed that one cola can was wrinkled. I put it back on the shelf, but it slipped from my grasp, and Murphy had his due. It sprayed about eight ounces of high fructose corn syrup all over me, the scrap barrel, the shelves, and my tablesaw.

Murphy will not be denied!

Reply to
scritch
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Fist anti-gloat I've seen in a while around here ... you blow, dood! ;)

Reply to
Swingman

Murphy hell, you qualify as another Joe #$$RFD%$#$$$.

Remember Lil Abner and the guy who walked around with a dark cloud over his head all the time, Joe #$$RFD%$#$$$?

You must be his brother

Lew

Reply to
Lew Hodgett

"scritch" wrote

Oh my god!!

I hope the saw wasn't hurt!!

Reply to
Lee Michaels

Not meaning to be pedantic, but wasn't that "Joe Btfsplk"?

Reply to
J. Clarke

Earthquake McGoon (or something like)

Reply to
Morris Dovey

Close enough for atom bombs, horse shoes and comic strip characters.

Lew

Reply to
Lew Hodgett

On 8/22/2009 5:50 PM scritch spake thus:

[snip story]

[snort] Funny. +10.
Reply to
David Nebenzahl

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