What's your Piston Count?

Hi,

A comment by Medway Handyman on another thread has got me thinking about technical jargon.

In our company we are mostly engineers/tecchies of one sort or another. And you know how it is.....tecchies have this constant game of trumps going all the time.

Who has the best mobile? Fastest internet connection? Most powerful PC? best Home Cinema? Most diagonal screen inches? The list goes on for ever.

A few years ago an American friend of ours introduced us to the concept of "Piston Count". This is quite the most ridiculous parameter our staff have EVER adopted for the purpose of trumping one another. Let me explain the rules:

You need to sum up all of the pistons in your household. Qualifying pistons must exist in functional internal combustion engines. Vehicles, power tools and garden machines are all valid.

So my piston count is 16 which breaks down as: Volvo (5), Toyota (4), Chainsaw, Mower, Ancient Flymo, Chainsaw, Brushcutter, Hedge Cutter, Shredder (7).

The highest we had in our company ever as 42 (the guy had a TVR and a Triumph Stag amongst other cars)

What's your piston count then?

+++++++

By the way functional model engines are permissible, as are boat engines. After much debate we also allowed company car pistons to be included. The matter of a Mazda RX7 was however never satisfatorily resolved.

Reply to
Vortex
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Obviously they have no life!

I feel sorry for people like that, they are often insecure or ill. I bet most are not married or even have a long term male partner.

It's sad that you also need to post details here, no one is interested! Go out and get yourself a girlfriend or boyfriend, whichever you choose. That will take you mind off always trying to be in competition with others. It's pointless as you will never have the best.

Who cares, I'm not some sad old man with no life or family. You really do need to get out more! I often wondered which "type" used phone insurance to upgrade when their friends got a better phone.

Reply to
bronco

What's your chip count then?

BTW If you can't find any look on your shoulder.

Reply to
Vortex

Blimey, it's Dr Ruth with a dash of homophobia.

Reply to
Steve Walker

Oh well, it you're counting any engines it must be dozens - all those model aero engins in the shed!

Mary

Reply to
Mary Fisher

Come on! It's only a bit of fun. I've wondered about it myself.

Mary

Reply to
Mary Fisher

(snip)

No, the really sad one is you, feeling that you have to reply in such detail.

Reply to
Bob Eager

So, you have less pistons than Vortex then?

Reply to
Schrodinger's cat

Fewer pistons...!

And much sadder than Vortex too!

Reply to
Bob Eager

Our company is based in Houston, TX. I visit there regularly, and have friends who have moved over there permenantly.

This is truly the land of Gas Guzzling pickups.

It's not piston count that they compare: it's displacement. Often, people boast about how they've broken the 10Litre barrier without too much effort.

2 Pickup Trucks at close to 5 L each, and throw in a lawnmower, and thre you are!
Reply to
Ron Lowe

Holds hands up!

Oops...

Reply to
Schrodinger's cat

In message , Ron Lowe writes

er.... 39 at roughly 1 litre each, not counting the lawnmower/strimmer etc.

regards

>
Reply to
Tim Lamb

Vortex used his keyboard to write :

OK, I'll play...

Car a 4, car b 6, car c 4; bike 4, mower 1, chainsaw 1, compressor 1.

Total 21

Reply to
Harry Bloomfield

well I thik its 22..

hedegtrimmer 1

2 mowers 2 chainsaw 1 strimnmer 1

three 4 cyl cars 12 one 5 cyl car 5

Waht about ELECTRIC nodels motores. must have around 20 of those..

as are boat engines.

Reply to
The Natural Philosopher

|Vortex used his keyboard to write : |> The highest we had in our company ever as 42 (the guy had a TVR and a Triumph |> Stag amongst other cars) | |> What's your piston count then? | |OK, I'll play... | |Car a 4, car b 6, car c 4; bike 4, mower 1, chainsaw 1, compressor 1. | |Total 21

You lost by causing too much Global Warming :-( In the UK few wins.

Reply to
Dave Fawthrop

Hmm,

4 minis, 16 pistons, 4.6l. 2 diesel runabouts, 8 pistons, 2.4l landy 4 pistons, 2.5l 3 lawnmowers, 3 pistons, not sure of the displacement....

so Im at 31, and around 10+ l + and model engines I have lying around.... Do get a prize ;)

Dave

Reply to
dave sanderson

Now of course if you had a plane with fucted dan.....

That would be worth the equivalent of several sets of pistons if only for brown trouser value.

Reply to
Andy Hall

Errr, one. (Assuming that you count the bike tyre inflation pump.)

Reply to
Aidan Karley

53

Mrcheerful

Reply to
mrcheerful

"Qualifying pistons must exist in functional internal combustion engines"

I was just about to add the WC ..... than I re-read the rules...

-- Adrian C

Reply to
Adrian C

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