OT: help needing in getting help to cope with a mentally ill person

[williamwright]

I thought this would be a good place to ask because there's a wide range of expertise here. It's also urgent. I have a friend who is in severe difficulty. She has coped reasonably well with her severely mentally ill son, who has lived with her for eleven years. Before that he was in a secure hospital for four years. He has become much more ill recently. He is injuring himself and he is violent. At the moment he is on the kitchen floor, screaming and shouting, and his head is bleeding all over the place. My friend is in her sixties and can't deal with this. She has asked the Adult Mental Health Unit to section him again and put him back in hospital so she can have respite, but they say he isn't ill enough. The GP seems powerless, but says the man is a danger. The ambulance service just ignores her requests for a visit. I am seriously concerned about my friend. I don't think she will be able to carry on for much longer. It's as if the NHS just doesn't want to know. Can anyone suggest what we can do to get some help?

Bill

[Sysadmin]

Tell the police he is dangerous.

[GB]

Sadly, this is probably right - call the police.

The OP says "he is violent", so this does require the police, who are far more able to deal with someone violent than any of the other emergency services.

Unfortunately, they may not be gentle, and they will probably cart him off to the nick. They do have access to the local mental health crisis team, which is what is needed, though.

I used to be a custody visitor, and I saw this in action occasionally. My sympathy is with your friend.

[SH]

I believe the police have powers to detain someone under the mental health act?

[SH]

[williamwright]

It's astonishing. They were out for five hours but since he hasn't yet hurt anyone else (recently) he hasn't committed an offence. Because she looks after him they seem to think it's problem solved. Her safety doesn't seem to be an issue.

Bill

[williamwright]

See my previous reply.

Bill

[williamwright]

He's at home; not in a public place. Apparently that makes a big difference and restricts police powers. In any case they appear to be unable to help. But maybe they're wrong. This is where we need hard info. I'll have to read your links carefully. Thanks.

Bill

[Sn!pe]

Yes. Calling the police is best, in the circumstances. Don't delay.

[williamwright]

Thanks, but see my other replies.

Bill

[Dave Plowman (News]

I'd guess the only way the police might get involved is if he assaulted her, and a neighbour reported it.

I'm afraid it is all down to the massive cuts in real terms made to mental health budgets over the years. Mental health isn't a nice headline grabber like cancer.

[williamwright]

Thanks for replies so far. We've had a lot of help from the police but they can't stay in the house for ever and they say they can't arrest him or take him away because he's already in a place of safety. Frankly what we need is some way to make the various arms of the NHS do something, and they are just stonewalling us. He needs to be in hospital but because his mum is with him they say there's no need. But if something isn't done quick she's going to crack, and I really don't like to think what will happen then.

Bill

[Sn!pe]

Tell the police that mum is in danger. Good luck.

[Sn!pe]

[...]

I'd stretch the truth and tell them that mum was in danger. Maybe she could declare herself afraid and leave the premises, perhaps the coppers might do something then.

[The Natural Philosopher]

Yes. If mum is 'at risk' then the police have to act. Perhaps mum could acquire an 'injury' to make the point?

[S Viemeister]

Could _her_ GP be persuaded to say that _her_ mental health is in danger, due to inability to cope with her son's problems?

[RJH]

Sounds distressing. There *should* be a social services contact, and a 24 hour service when they're not there. 'Danger to themselves or others' is the phrase they look for - failure to take medication is an example of something that can get them moving IME. I know the examples you've given are pretty graphic, but they're seemingly not triggering anything.

Best of luck to you all.

[Harry Bloomfield, Esq.]

on 11/12/2021, Fredxx supposed :

Might this be better coming from a third party (Bill), as an independent witness to the problem? Would it be worth ringing local councillor for some help to cut through the systems red tape?

[Tim+]

Oh dear, what a dreadful situation to find oneself in. I wonder whether it would be worth calling the mental health unit and recording a conversation (after announcing that you?re doing so) along the lines of ?I am scared for my own safety and the safety of my son. He is severely disturbed and agitated and has hurt himself. In the event of further harm coming to himself or myself, this recording will be passed on the the press/health authority/police/other??

Tim

[Pamela]

If the son is severely mentally ill then there should be a care plan with contingency action listed ibcluding escalation to a mental health "crisis team" with a skeleton out-of-hours skeleton but the provision of this is frequently inadequate.

If that doesn't work then I agree with others who suggest to call the police to visit as they who can contact social services or the mental health team for an urgent visit.

In addition, in the longer term social services have a duty to keep your friend safe and that would include from members of her own family, such as the behavior of a mentally ill son. They are slow to respond (days and weeks) but you are freeing them of their responsibilities if you do not inform them and request intervention.

The GP is not actually powerless as he and another doctor or social worker can assess the son and the two can section him if appropriate.

All this has a feeling of the son not taking his medication.