New apprentice gets off to a flying start

He filled in his new starter form and where it said "Next of kin" he put "My Mum".
--


Adam

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Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
tim
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On 11/01/2019 19:41, tim... wrote:

Doctor, to my daughter: "I see you're going to be 3 soon. When's that going to be?" Daughter: "On my birfday."
How old is the apprentice?
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On Saturday, 12 January 2019 13:05:52 UTC, GB wrote:

Doctor, to teenage girl: "Big breaths"
Girl: "Yeth, and I'm only fourteen"
Owain
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On 12/01/2019 17:08, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

I think that should be Sithxteen?
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Dave
The Medway Handyman
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snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

Thixteen
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On Sunday, 13 January 2019 02:32:29 UTC, FMurtz wrote:

I think nowadays the age has to be reduced to make the joke funnier.
Thixteen year olds probably have two kids now.
Owain
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On 13/01/2019 10:14, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

"Mummy, why are your hanths tho thoft?"
"'Cause I'm twelve. Now shut up and eat your chips."
--
Max Demian

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On 13/01/2019 10:14, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

"Mummy mummy can I get pregnant?" "Of course not Susan you are only seven" "Right lads same again"
--
Adam

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On 13/01/2019 11:11, ARW wrote:

This has to be the funniest few posts I've seen on here for like... 20 years. Then again my memory might be showing signs of age related degeneration.
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On Sunday, 13 January 2019 11:11:52 UTC, ARW wrote:

"Okay Mr Khan, I'd like another free kebab please."
Owain
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On 14/01/2019 11:38, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

Not coloured, not Muslim and not called Khan. harry will be offended.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-south-yorkshire-46827035
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Adam

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On 15/01/2019 20:07, ARW wrote:

I predict a grim future for that nonce in jail...
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Email does not work

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On 15/01/2019 23:02, Tim Watts wrote:

They are kept away from other prisoners. At the prisons I have worked at they have their own wing (not the female prisons).
--
Adam

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snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

but thixteen has the lisp which is essential to the original
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That’s a different effect. Kids that young have no concept of how far into the future things are. They do understand the concept of in the future or in the past but have trouble with tomorrow and next week, let alone in 4 months time for the birthday.

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On 12/01/2019 13:05, GB wrote:

Not old enough to vote but old enough have sex.
--
Adam

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On 11/01/2019 19:04, ARW wrote:

I blame the person who designed the form if it did not specify eg the first and last _names_ of the NOK.
Anyhow, could have been worse: eg "my Wensleydale".
--
Robin
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On Friday, 11 January 2019 20:30:54 UTC, Robin wrote:

I didn't recognise that as a dog breed.
Then I googled it and found it wasn't.
Owain
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Obviously he is referring to a cheese.
--

Roger Hayter

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