Getting rid of a piano.

Its called hearing impairment, or deafness, in old money.

well played pizzicato, actually sometimes they do..

I've made electric guitars sound like clarinets in my time..you need a certain woddy sounding loudspeaker enclosure and a certain amount of even harmonic distrortion, and a bit of an artist in the thing to control the attack, which is a bit of a giveaway on a guitar, but the sustained note is very close to a reed instrument. The sound of the reed flapping together is duplicated by the asymmetric clipping in the amplifier...

You can make a sax sound like Hendrix....all you need is an overdrive pedal, a transducer, a good amp and a pair of earplugs. Only works from around octave G up.

Regards,

Eh? What??

Regards,

Or tinnitus. :-(

That little cash?

The Moody Blues used a Mellotron

It's a running gag due to torque figures being quoted in different ways.

Top Gear simply emulates a bunch of lads playing out their pub fantasies. If you don't like the idea don't watch it.

Weird this jazz thing. It never actually dies, but it's been on the verge of it for the last 50 years. Can't fill the back room of a pub for a jazz gig these days. I was shocked to see Tal Farlow playing in the corner of a pub in Oxford with no one listening, and that was 20 years ago.

You've already made it clear you don't understand it - not much point your trying to critique it when you haven't got a clue what's going on.

Regards,

It's like most forms of specialised music, it's under-funded and under-promoted. Practically any form of non-mainstream music suffers in the same way - even esoteric rock or the just plain not fashionable.

On the whole, jazz fans tend to prefer going to specialist venues - and with good reason. I once went to see the great Eddie Thompson play in a bar in Essex...and there was a guy shoving coins in a fruit machine for half the first set. The landlord refused to switch the machine off.

Should be interesting over the next decade or so, with the influx of decent and extremely cheap instruments from China.

Regards,

The only semi-serious jazz venues in London seem to be The Vortex and The 606. Ronnie's has become the typical corporate night club, which I guess was inevitable, and the pizza houses don't do it for me. Hovering waiters etc. I think young British players are perhaps trying too hard to be innovative and have forgotten how to enjoy themselves.

Mellotron. I tend to think of Peter Sellers shagging Princess Margaret instead.

A Mellotron also used strips of tapes, not loops. These were rewound under tension once released, but it did mean that you couldn't sustain a note indefinitely, only for a few seconds.

Depends what you mean by 'serious'. In 'big name' terms, perhaps - but there are some very seriously good players to be seen at places like the legendary Bull's Head, Dover St. Wine Bar, Jazz Cafe etc.

I'd disagree with your statement about young British jazzers, mostly on the basis that I get to meet or hear about a lot of them ( as you might imagine ), and they seem to be thoroughly enjoying themselves. Check out someone like Paul Booth or Dunstan Coulber, for instance.

Regards,

There was a sound FX one in the sound library at Teddington Studios when I worked there. Dunno what happened to it - probably skipped. They were never quality devices due to the slow tape speed and azimuth problems. But a novel idea in its day.

The Bulls Head Barnes manages - at least when I go there.

I used to work with a chap called Archie, a jazz bassist, and when I mentioned I was going to the Bull's Head for the very first time he told me to be sure to buy the barman a drink - he gave no reason, but said I should not forget to do so and that I would find out why.

So, I pitched up at the pub about 30 minutes before the gig started, bought a pint and duly asked the barman if he'd have one himself.

The place began to fill up, so I grabbed a seat and settled down to listen to the band. Come half time and barely before the cymbals had come to rest, the bar was packed solid with punters trying to get a drink. I stood at the back of a considerable crush...and then to my complete surprise a hand appeared above the melee and a loud ( Scottish ) voice said "Here you go, Sir" and the crowd parted as the barman held out my pint.

Regards,