Best tool for the job Pt13

Doggerland?

You are aliving jpeg? Brian

S*it creek?

Dangling from a weather balloon munching a pie?

Looking for friends somewhere?

Thanks for dobbing me in to the DVLA for driving whilst unfit and injured - that was a good one!

Letter is in the post to Swansea, as we say.

On Mon, 19 Dec 2016 22:57:58 -0000, Simon Mason wro= te:

red - that was a good one!

Do tell....

-- =

FOR SALE BY OWNER. Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica , 45 volumes.=

Excellent condition, =A3200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

On Sat, 17 Dec 2016 06:18:01 -0000, Simon Mason wro= te:

Drowning?

-- =

FOR SALE BY OWNER. Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica , 45 volumes.=

Excellent condition, =A3200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

I got a letter yesterday from the DVLA stating that a 3rd party had reported me as being advised by my GP not to drive due to my smashed in left leg that a lorry ran over. "judith" will have done it.

You seem to have a fungal nail infection of your right big toe.

No probs. - they told me they would ask for a letter from your doctor - is that what they did? I suggested also a letter from a psychiatrist - but they actually said they were not concerned about your mental state. I didn't think that was very good - as people here have such concerns

Haven't BG been in touch yet regarding your free electricity?

Nope - I am still on the smart meter waiting list and they are very busy at the moment with other matters to bother about a poxy semi near Hull as the y can't seem to get competent staff these days, which is why I will be taki ng home £2500 pcm next year due to my unique skillset.

Oh dear - yet another letter needed :

".........in distress as do the police on a weekly basis as I hear them on my scanner."

Is it not illegal to listen to police radio communication?

Yes - here was my reply. Letter is the the post as we speak.

It's not the police, but Humber Rescue talking to the cop helicopter in the clear. Beside which, it is an unwanted EM radiation that is invading my property and I am entitled to see what its nature is.

you are well behind the times...I suggest you don't write a letter about that .....It's called wasting police time.....

So it invades your property by the f*ck-off aerial you have put up on your house.

Did you need planning permission for that?

Did the advert say "F****it needed" then?

(Did you tell them you had tried to top yourself? - What did they say?)