The Woodworkers Ten Commandments

[Mekon]

1. Thou shalt not paint
2. Thou shalt do all thy can to ensure that thou leavethe the shop with the same number of body parts in roughly the same place as you entered it.
3. Thou shalt extract dust as it is an abomination to thy lungs.
4. Thou shalt remove ties and loose clothing before operating machinery
5. Thou shalt sharpen thy tools and treat them with respect, for they are wondrous in our eyes
6. Thou shalt measure twice and make assunder once for a cut once made is impossible to unmake and wood that is too short is an abomination.
7. Thou shall unplug thy tools before changing any parts lest thy parts become changed.
8. Thou shalt use the right tool for the right job for that is the purpose for which they are ordained.
9. Thou shalt oil thy table saw tops and other bare steel tools as rust is an abomination in the shop
10. Thou shalt avoid borrowing tools but return promptly and in good repair all those which thou has borrowed.

Mekon

[Tom Watson]

Excepting those cases of Germanic Folk Furniture in the Pennsylvania style that rely heavily on same.

Excepting my voluminous belly, which I have endeavored to leave in the shop by spending more time there.

Which is immeasurably relieved by adopting the neander methodology, which creates no dust and is satisfying unto God.

See supra. Yet, beware working in an entire state of nature, as this has been found to be criminal in certain jurisdictions.

I bow to your complete understanding in this regard.

Cut the long pieces first and this warning will work its way down to the unseen.

The obvious opportunity for doubled entendre is hereby specifically eschewed.

I am all for the ordination of tools, so long as they are heterosexual.

Sigh... this is quite the religious issue, isn't it.

I am in most holy agreement with this.

Nice list, Mekon. I was just having a little fun.

Regards,

Tom Watson

tjwatson1ATcomcastDOTnet (real email)

[Zz Yzx]

What about:

"Remember to keep holey the Sabbath"? ( i.e. do all your drilling and wood boring on Sunday.)

"Thow shalt not commit adultery" (i.e. do not stain cherry).

"Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors SWMBO". (well, unless she's got her own set of tools).

"Thou shalt not bear false witness." (i.e. no trolling, feeding trolls, or cross-posting).

"Never eat anything bigger than your head" (this one's self explanatory).

"When in doubt, do what the doubters do" (i.e. DAGS)

-Zz

[Mekon]

(snip)

Me too, tongue firmly in cheek when I wrote it - Though I did think afterwards that some might condemn me to the fires for it.

Mekon

[charlie b]

1. Thout shalt not bleeeeed (nor should anyone else in the shop)!

( all the others were developed by mere mortals )

charlie b

[Mekon]

...for it staineth the wood and that is an unpardonable sin

Mekon

[Peter Huebner]

Ah, that brings on another: Thou shalt not leave linseed oil rags lying about, under any circumstances, whatsoever.

-P.

[Peter Huebner]

Try telling that to any of the women around here. Or to my father (chisels for screwdrivers, screwdrivers for cold chisels, hammerdrill for wood -- I lock my shop when I know he has a PROJECT).

Can I have a little bit of desert climate please? Amazingly the tools in my woodshop don't seem to rust (much) but everything steel outside it ..... yeesh. We seem to have >90% humidity 360 days in the year.

Please write that in red letters on a large board and nail it to my neighbour's head, would you, pretty please?

-Peter

[Glen]

Try telling that to Roy Underhill.

;-) Glen

[Phisherman]

I just broke this one. Yesterday I finished a wooden plant dolly I made and painted it with wood primer, then high-gloss white enamel. I have not ever painted cherry wood, ever, as this is a mortal sin.

This is a good one. I hope everyone keeps safety in mind, always!

True. Protect your health. A healthy body means many more years of making sawdust.

I like short sleeves, and prefer crew cuts.

I need to learn to like sharpening more so I do more of it.

I learned this one the hard way. I'm sure most woodworkers do.

I abandoned the idea of hard-wiring anything. Plugs area good thing.

A good excuse to buy another tool!

I don't have this problem. I feel very fortunate to have an air-conditioned shop. At one time I considered an old chicken coop for a wood shop.

"Always a friend. Never borrow, never lend."

[Joe_Stein]

Just completed 3 cabinets for the laundry room as requested by SWMBO. 3 coats of paint each. Guess I'll burn in heck for that one. Have fun y'all. Joe

[Renata]

-snip-

Ah-HEM.

Around here!? As in the wreck? Or your abode?

-snip-

[Morris Dovey]

| On Sat, 24 Jun 2006 22:25:48 +1200, Peter Huebner | wrote: | || In article , || [e-mail] says... ||| 8. Thou shalt use the right tool for the right job for that is ||| the purpose for which they are ordained. || || Try telling that to any of the women around here. | -snip- | | Ah-HEM. | | Around here!? As in the wreck? Or your abode?

ROFL - I think 'around here' you're more like 'one of us' - whether you like/choose it or not.

-- Morris Dovey DeSoto Solar DeSoto, Iowa USA