This has become a very Scary World to live in.
It's not the economy, not politics, not the threats of hurricanes,
tornados earthquakes, nuclear war and other disasters. It's not even
What it is, are bladders. We now have human bladders with arms, legs,
and big blue eyes that stare at people, and drag people around by their
hands and force them to go to public restrooms. And God only knows what
they do once they get you into the restroom, and it's only You and that
I get a big laugh out of these commercials that say "50% of men over the
age of 50 will have to get up to piss during the night". I had to get up
to piss when I was 15, 25, 40, 50 and more.... In other words, all my
life. And back when I would drink far too much beer, I'd have to get up
every half hour all night long to piss.... But all of a sudden, pissing
during the night is a bad thing.... (Of course because there is money to
be made by convincing people that pissing during the night is a bad
It is preferential to refrain from the utilization of sesquipadelian verbiage in the circumstance that your intellectualization can be expressed using comparatively simplistic lexicological entities.
The Archbishop of Canterbury and The Royal Commission for Political Correctness announced today that the climate in the UK should no longer be referred to as "English Weather".
Rather than offend a sizeable portion of the UK population, it will now be referred to as "Muslim Weather" - (Partly Sunni, but mostly Shi'ite).
On Sunday, April 17, 2016 at 7:59:33 PM UTC-4, email@example.com wrote:
Reminds me of what my bartender buddy once told me back when Perrier
was all the rage amongst the yuppie crowd.
They'd come into the bar and order "Perrier on the rocks".
Did they think the "rocks" were made with Perrier? They'd pay ridiculous
amounts of money for the purity of Perrier and then add bar ice to it.
Bar ice: Tap water frozen in a rusty machine out in the back hallway,
transported in old bucket on the shoulder of a greasy bar-back, then
dumped into a bin under the bar where God knows what can fall in it in
between the times the bartender grabs the ice scoop (maybe) and then
tosses it back on top of the ice.
Look up "immune system". Germs are everywhere. You can't sanitise everything.
Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.. I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
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