funeral mums

So anyway I attended a funeral and only two or three flowers were taken. Someone came up to me and told me I should take all of the other flowers because nobody wanted them and they would leave them at the cemetary to be thrown away or whatever. Among them were a bunch of the big-bloomed mums. I know nothing about these - are they like the fancy pottle cyclamens, indoor-only plants, or can I plant these outside with all of the "normal" mums?
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A friend of mine got a lovely pot of "florist" mums for her birthday. She was ready to pitch the plant when it was done and I took it and planted it, after trimming it 'way back. I took the trimmings and put them in small pots. About 18 small pots. Planted them in the ground when they had taken root and ALL are blooming right now. The cutting are about 8-10" tall and full of blooms. They will be much bigger next year.
The "mother" plant is gorgeous!
I did expect the new blooms to be somewhat inferior to the "forced" big blooms from the florist, but was nicely surprised to see these beautiful big blooms in my garden.
griffon wrote:

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Just curious..is it usual to do that in America?
Here in the UK, it's fairly common to request "no flowers please", or "family flowers only" or for mourners to donate money to a charity chosen by the deceased or his family, instead.
I've never, ever heard of mourners here taking away the funeral flowers afterwards, even at cremations. At burials, the grave is filled in after everyone has left, and the flowers/wreaths arranged on top. Family and close friends often return to the graveside alone during the next few days and perhaps find some comfort in the flowers and tributes.
Janet.
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Janet Baraclough.. wrote:

It differs.
You may not realize that cemeteries here are a often great distance from the family/friends and people cannot go back easily to visit the graveside. Some people will have a "memorial marker" placed at their church because of this.
I have seen potted plants at funerals that were given to family and friends to take away as "memorial" plants. I took plants from my Grandfather's funeral and distributed them to his elderly friends who were not able to attend his funeral. They were so terribly pleased. Same is done with the fresh flowers sometimes.
Also here, some families request "contributions to the American Heart Association(or similar) in lieu of flowers".
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Along with the option of contributions, In some areas, (USA)the potted plants are taken by or distributed to family members who wish to have them and the floral arrangements placed on the grave. Many of my friends have plants that they have had for years that they acquired from a loved ones funeral and will point them out like,'that's from Mother's funeral,' or Aunt Alice or who ever and you can see the love in their eyes at the memory. I have a tiny clear glass caraf with rose petals from my father's and also one with carnations from my mothers funeral. I frequently touch base with them since I can't go to the cemetery. Also I decopauged (sp?) my daddy's little card that is passed out at most funerals here with the names, dates prayers etc and it stands on one of my library shelves in memory. leo/lee
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Jewish funerals generally do not have flowers at the gravesite. Instead, a rock is placed on top of the tombstone (after a year of the burial- which is when the tombstone is placed) to signify rememberance, also in Florida, we use shells!
--
gloria - only the iguanas know for sure



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Somewhat on the same topic...don't bring an even number of flowers (or white flowers) to a European host or hostess. Both are traditionally used at funerals. zemedelec
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from snipped-for-privacy@aol.comspamfree (Zemedelec) contains these words:

Which European country are you thinking of? In this one, funeral flowers are multicoloured, and arum lilies are the only ones I can think of that might carry a funereal association.
Janet.
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Zemedelec wrote ".....Somewhat on the same topic...don't bring an even number of flowers (or white flowers) to a European host or hostess. Both are traditionally used at funerals..."
I think that this is just to much of a generalisation. Even numbers of flowers are harder to arrange than an odd number, In the UK it was considered to be unlucky to have red and white flowers together (Possible related to Blood and Bandages). Whilst Red and white carnations are used in Poland for funerals. I was told years ago when I had a load of cyclamen to sell at Xmas that in Wales they reminded people of funerals (I've never heard of them being used ) whilst in England I could never get enough white. Also it's said that Arum Lilies remind people of funerals, but in the 20's and 30's they were used extensively for bridal flowers.
--
David Hill
Abacus nurseries
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from snipped-for-privacy@1starnet.com (Lee) contains these words:

Same here; which is probably why so many people visit the decorated grave again in private before they travel back home.

We don't "do" potted plants at funerals here either, but I think it's a nicer idea than wreaths, and one which I shall try to propagate :-)
Janet.
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at my mothers memorial (no funeral) a month after she died I had picked up and potted day lilies available for people to take home from her garden. the memorial was on her huge porch overlooking the flower beds. she had given most everyone so many plants over the years that almost everyone who spoke mentioned some favorite flower or other that had come from her garden. And then there is the person I contacted who is naming a day lily after her and I will buy them and distribute pieces to her friends. Ingrid

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