OT--You Know You Don't Live In California When...

WTF do black or Jew jokes have to do with California jokes? California isn't a race or a culture (medium, maybe) or anything like that.

No, I can't.

Canuckistan? Eh?

I really wonder how much attention you pay to anything that doesn't fall within the purview of your pet whine.

Charlie Self "It is not strange... to mistake change for progress." Millard Fillmore

Reply to
Charlie Self
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OOOOH!

Hey everyone... Californians are *race* now!

That means we can't tell joke like this any more...

How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just two, but it has to be a *big* light bulb!

LOL! That one always cracks me up!

What's brown, sticky and Californian?

A Californian's stick!

Hee hee hee. My pet rabbit loves that one.

Thanks, you've been great. I'm here all week.

djb

Reply to
Dave Balderstone

Study history... California is often a joke. More than once a year, in my experience.

And I'm not even a 'Murrican!

And, I visit California about once a year!

And I have lots of Californians I count as friends!

But it's a wacky state, and deserves to be made fun of, just about as much as Wisconsin.

"Oh dadee-oh, you guys are so CRAZEE!"

Reply to
Dave Balderstone

I would agree. One of the axioms of my business is that the more defensive somebody acts, the guiltier they feel.

Reply to
Mortimer Schnerd, RN

...when you don't get this old chestnut:

A Texan, a Californian and an Oregonian were sitting around drinking.The Texan finished his tequila, through the bottle in the air and shot it. "Why'd you do that?" asked the Californian? "Aw, there's lots more tequila bottles where that came from," was the reply. The Californian finished his white wine, through the bottle in the air and shot it. "Why'd you do that?" asked the Oregonian. "California is awash in wine bottles," he answered. The Oregonian finished his Blitz-Weinhard and shot the Californian."Why'd you do that?" asked the Texan. "Oregon's full of Californians,but that bottle's worth a nickel."

-Derek

Reply to
Kiwanda

In article , "Bruce" wrote: [snip]

Makes *me* wonder if *you* have ever been outside SoCal...

To any Midwesterner, the Bay Area is indeed "wall-to-wall cities". It may not be as bad as parts of the East Coast, but it's still waaaaay more congested than anywhere in the Midwest (with the possible exception of Chicago).

-- Regards, Doug Miller (alphageek-at-milmac-dot-com)

For a copy of my TrollFilter for NewsProxy/Nfilter, send email to autoresponder at filterinfo-at-milmac-dot-com

Reply to
Doug Miller

Ummm.... that would be Michigan, actually, not California. :-)

-- Regards, Doug Miller (alphageek-at-milmac-dot-com)

For a copy of my TrollFilter for NewsProxy/Nfilter, send email to autoresponder at filterinfo-at-milmac-dot-com

Reply to
Doug Miller

It wasn't meant as a zinger, just an observation. You're being a bit defensive about the whole thing and attacking Charlie seemed over the top. Dave in Fairfax

Reply to
Dave in Fairfax

Spaking for all Canadians, our response in such a situation would be to apologize insincerely and get on with our lives.

;-)

Reply to
Dave Balderstone

Sorry for the typo. That should have been either "Speaking for all Canadians" or "Spanking for all Canadians"

You choose.

;-)

Reply to
Dave Balderstone

But in Wisconsin we can laugh at ourselves.

We once had a Governor who suggested that our license plates should say "Eat Cheese or Die".

Reply to
Ron Bean

My last trip to San Jose was like a weird, irrational dream. Rent for an unfurnished one-bedroom apartment ran over $2K/month. The City of San Jose was having trouble hiring police, firemen, and teachers because the salary scales didn't permit these people to actually reside in San Jose. The Mercury printed a full-page picture of a tiny bungalow with the caption: "You always wanted a million dollar estate - you just figured it would have more than

700 square feet." I still have that page somewhere.

Even the eco-freaks drive gas guzzling SUV's. San Jose's example-setting mayor had to buy a brand new Blazer to drive the couple of blocks from his home to his office. I'm guessing that he thought he'd wake up some morning and need 4WD to get over all the boulders he'd find littering the street.

From my location I had to travel on an eight-lane expressway to get to the local barber shop. My neighbors thought that was pretty much normal!

Ditto the grocery stores; and when I got there I found produce that no Iowa farmer would feed to pigs. I found myself buying frozen vegetables (imported from Mexico). Not sure why, but I did expect high-quality produce in (from) California.

And the thing that has always amazed me (and most of the midwesterners I know) is how Californians seem unable to distinguish between celebrity and intelligence, wisdom, or technical competance. I know for a fact that California has no shortage of really bright people - so why?

It's the only place I've ever been where a public utility (and politicians) could get away with ripping off their customers/constituants for billions (thousands of millions) of dollars just by shutting down portions of the power grid at intervals. [And although my account was paid in full, PG&E never did return my several hunderd dollar deposit.]

Reply to
Morris Dovey

Give it man, you ain't gonna win no matter how hard you try.

Reply to
Jerry Gilreath

If I'm on the receiving end, I'll go for "speaking".

Charlie Self "It is not strange... to mistake change for progress." Millard Fillmore

Reply to
Charlie Self

Ron Bean notes:

That must have been about the time I lived there. But if he'd been PC, he'd have admitted, "Eat Cheese & Die" was more truthful.

Charlie Self "It is not strange... to mistake change for progress." Millard Fillmore

Reply to
Charlie Self

the Fremont store is busy, busy, busy. I hate Fry's anyway! :) But I go to the Hamilton Ave. store when I can't what I want elsewhere.

I got right in at 5 PM tonight at Cheesecake factory at the new Oakridge Mall. How's that for luck. We usually walk in and walk out because the wait is so long.

dave

RK> You forgot one .... Standing in Line... I was at Fryes in Fremont last

Reply to
Bay Area Dave

See, you do have a sense of humor after all. Ed

Reply to
Edwin Pawlowski

When you have friendly wildlife like this:

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'S' funny, I got exactly the same pics from a friend in OZ, claiming they were about an oil pipeline being built from Mozambique to Sasolburg, alongside the National Road to Komatipoort.

Who knows?

Reply to
Norman D. Crow

California -- at least the jokes, anyway -- is *definitely* a medium.

Proof: not rare. not well-done.

Q.E.D.

*snicker*
Reply to
Robert Bonomi

"Mortality rate for non-cheese-eaters: 100%"

Reply to
Robert Bonomi

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