10. I Hate Every Bone In Her Body But Mine
09. I Ain't Never Gone To Bed With an Ugly Woman But I Woke Up With A
08. If The Phone Don't Ring, You'll Know It's Me
07. I've Missed You, But My Aim's Improvin'
06. Wouldn't Take Her To A Dogfight 'Cause I'm Scared She'd Win
05. I'm So Miserable Without You It's Like You're Still Here
04. My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend And I Miss Him So
03. She Took My Ring and Gave Me the Finger
02. She's Lookin' Better with Every Beer
*And the Number One Country & Western song is...*
01. It's Hard To Kiss the Lips at Night That Chewed My Ass All Day
"Leavin you was easier than quit'n my day job"
"How can I love you when you won't lay down?"
"I flounder and then I lobster" (fish song)
"We ran out of gas on the road to love"
"You only say you love me when you're drunk"
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