Not 'really' OT

Mar 21, 2005 28 Replies

I was going to learn to use a router, but I didn't dare to take the plunge.



I was going to be a lawyer, but I couldn't find my briefs.



I was going to be a doctor, but I didn't have the patience.



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"Robatoy"

I was going to be a skydiver but I was not ready to take the leap.

I was going to be a surgeon but didn't make the cut.

......................

Dave

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I wanted to be a mathematician but couldn't integrate.

OKOK, its weak, but I like it anyway (my g/f is a mathie). Have you heard the joke about e^x at the party...

PK

Ask her "what's purple and commutes?"

While we're on that subject:

Three squaws were each preparing for the birth of their first child. The first placed a large bear hide by the river, the second squaw placed an elk hide by the tree by the river, and the third squaw placed a hippopotamus hide by a path, near the river and the tree, so that the three formed a triangle.

It just so happened that all three women gave birth on the same day. The first squaw on the bear hide had a 5lb son, the second on the elk hide had a 6lb son, and the third squaw on the hippopotamus hide had an

11lb son.

To this day, mathematicians credit these three women with the first proof of Pythagorus's Theory :

The son of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the adjacent hides.

I wanted to be a comedian, but everyone just laughed at me.

Oh my freakin' god, that's terrible.

ROFLMAO

-Phil Crow

Oh man, I love it.

So, there was this big math party. All the important functions where there; sin, cos, Pythagoras, everyone. e^x showed up to the party but was observed staying alone in the corner quietly. Some of the equations felt rather bad and went over to e^x and said to it: "Come on, have fun and join the party! You will never have fun if you don't integrate!". e^x replied: "Why bother, it doesn't make any difference".

ROFLMAO!!!

PK

I think she has just finished too many mid-terms; she doesn't get it. Ok, give!

PK

An Abelian grape.

On Tue, 22 Mar 2005 23:28:11 -0600, the inscrutable Australopithecus scobis spake:

I don't get it. Give!

======================================================== Was that an African +

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or European Swallow? + Gourmet Web Applications ========================================================

" A group or other algebraic object is said to be Abelian if the law of commutativity always holds."

;-)

And while we're at it, don't forget that all involutory collineations are harmonic homologies. Sheeeesh. j4

or about the constipated accountant that worked it out with a pencil?

mac

Please remove splinters before emailing

[...]

The one about the e^x bragging to the differential operator that it can't be harmed just to hear: "Pity. I'm d/dy..."?

I wanted to be a teacher but didn't make the grade...

I was going to be a butcher but didn't make the cut..

I was going to be a mule skinner, but couldn't find my ass?

mac

Please remove splinters before emailing

  1. You're not a mathemetician, so it won't be funny. Trust me on this.
  2. One of the properties of an Abelian group is that it is commutative. (Addition is commutative; 4 + 3 = 3 + 4.) Groups are apparently very interesting to maths types. I never took those courses, though.
  3. What's purple and wants to rule the world? Alexander the grape. You get the picture...

or the constipated engineer who worked it out with a slide rule?

Purple in the ocean? Moby Grape.

That's .. what's pink and floats in the ocean..

Moby's dick.

... I don't write them...

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