TOT how do you first realise you are drunk?

Question

With me, it's one of the following: 1. The woman reading the news on Sky News gets very attractive 2. The bottom of the lavatory bowl seems to move towards and away from me 3. My piss stream amuses me 4. The left side of my upper lip twitches 5. It seems feasible to repair the body rot on the motorhome 6. I start to fry bacon 7. I decide that another pint and then a rum won't do any harm 8. I walk with my fingers brushing against the doors and walls, and feel  that this puts power into my body 9. I go on Facebook and alienate a lot of people 10. I listen to an American C & W station. Later: 1. There's something wrong with my eyes 2. I wish I hadn't eaten all that bacon and sausage and mushrooms 3. Must get this uneven floor fixed 4. The rapid sideways movement of the bedroom ceiling must surely be  illusory, and why am I dressed? Bill

Mike Barnes · Accepted Answer

A friend of mine told me she was allergic to leather. Her evidence:  whenever she woke up with her shoes on, she had a headache.

stuart noble · Answer

The woman in the kebab shop gets very attractive

F Murtz · Answer

Yes all those things and I don't drink alcohol.

Tim Lamb · Answer

In message , F  Murtz  writes Sadly a single glass of wine with supper causes such a volume change in  my snoring that sharing a bed becomes a problem:-(

charles · Answer

try 2 - or even 3 - to see if it acts as a silencer>

Tim Streater · Answer

The mere existence of such stations, never mind listening to them, should be a capital offence.

Bob Eager · Answer

Unfortunately our neighbours have started playing C&W in their garden. New boyfriend of the woman who lives there I think. Still trying to think of a legal way of 'fixing' that.

We keep showing the cats pictures of cockerels as they have one of those too. They seem to be slowly dealing with the rabbits.

Tim Streater · Answer

Talk to your districk councillor about noise nuisance? Always best if the issue can be mediated - have you spoken to them about it?

billyorange007 · Answer

Not as annoying as those prats driving around with all windows open and stereo wound up to the max playing some infernal disco music ( I presume its disco music)

I'm always tempted to wind down all my windows and give Classic FM a good blast

ARW · Answer

Don't use a pint glass then:-)

dave · Answer

On Fri, 6 Jun 2014 06:53:14 -0700 (PDT),          wrote:

TOT how do you first realise you are drunk?

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