Please forgive my husband Doggie for this recent rash of posts regarding his hatred for animals, and dogs in particular.
You see, he can't really help himself. Ever since he was a child he's held a distinct resentment against dogs due to the fact that his parents (god rest their christian souls) kept him tied up under the front porch.
You can only imagine how hard it's been for Doggie all these years to not hate dogs when he's always believed himself to be some sort of mutant doganoid, eating dog chow, treating on pig ears, and humping every leg he gets close to. My how the little fella loves those pig ears, he does.
So I humbly plead with you all to take pity on my Doggie and ignore his rantings. Just throw him a bone now and then and remember, even though he thinks he's a mutt he still can't lick his own balls. God knows he tries! In fact if you'll take the time to review this pic of Doggie you'll see the lengths at which I have to go to restrain most of the time.
I really believe that this inordinate desire of Doggie's to suck himself off 'coupled' with the fact that he can't, just drives him near to insanity. I believe with all my heart that this jealousy of his towards them is what causes him to hate animals so much.
Thanks for your understanding and may god bless you.
Sincerely, Mrs Kanter