A man wakes up from a coma in the hospital, totally encased in casts
and bandages and stuck with tubes and medical whatnot. A few minutes
later the nurse sees that he's awake, and calls the doctor.
The doctor tells him "Mr. Smith, you were in a horrible car wreck, you
were injured very badly. But you're going to be OK." The next day,
the doctor returns with the bad news. "Mr. Smith, there is some bad
news. You'll be OK, but we couldn't restore your penis, it was too
"BUT", the doctor continued, "at this hospital we've developed a
bionic penis. It's really quite good, we've implante dozens, and all
have performed well. Every recipient and their wives say it's better
than the real one. Your insurence company has already cut the check
for $20K. All you have to do is decide how big you want to go."
Mr. Smith says "I'll have to discuss this with my SWMBO. She's picky
about these things".
The next day the doctor returns and finds Mrs. Smith with her hubby.
"Have you decided? What's it going to be?"
Mr. Smith says, despondently.... "Yeah, we've decided....."
The doctor says, "well, what's it going to be"?
Mrs. Smith replies "GRANITE COUNTERTOPS".
"Zz Yzx" rhymes with "physics"; or " Isaacs" if you prefer.