Bad Cleaners, really bad

Some cleaners are just best avoided...

Blood: Mrs Beeton recommends purified bullocks blood for removing grease spots.

Fire is also used as an occasional specialist cleaner, but not recomended for general household use. Gas burners are sometimes used to clear paths of weeds.

Glo-fuel for model aircraft: various different formulae exist, containing methanol, oils, solvents such as ether, etc. Glo-fuel is highly volatile, highly flammable, explosive, very toxic, narcotic, contains ether which is a general anaesthetic from the Victorian era, and the fumes can be fatal. A powerful solvent, but the negative outcomes may somewhat outweigh the benefits.

Mercury: Used in cleaning powders for silver in Victorian times. Mercury vapour is toxic, mercury is toxic to eat, and the mercury makes the silver weak and brittle. Not an ideal cleaner.

Saliva: While not one of the favourite household cleaners, its fairly effective, and is used in some households. Contains enzymes.

Turd: yes, recommended for cleaning by.... Mrs Beeton again. To clean the char off scorched linen, she recommends: 1/2 pint of vinegar, 2 oz. of fuller=92s-earth, 1 oz. of dried fowls=92 dung, 1/2 oz. of soap, and the juice of 2 large onions. Thank god for the onions.

Urine: In Tudor times clothes were boiled in urine and wood ash on wash day. Lovely. The 2 react to make a form of soap, and both are cleaners in their own right to some extent. It need hardly be said that one should not skimp on rinsing.

Hydrofluoric acid: removes most types of dirt. Unfortunately it also removes whatever the dirt is on, hands, finger bones, pretty well everything. It is also difficult to store, since it attacks and eats even the most unreactive of storage materials. Store in glass coated in liquid paraffin, preferably anywhere but here.

Do you know any other bad cleaning ideas?

NT

Reply to
Tabby
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I have a bloody-great paraffin powered flame-thrower for weeds.

No idea why, I hardly ever use it, but it was a fiver from a boot sale years ago. Must stop it leaking, one day.

The kids love it - it's like having a dragon on a stick.

Reply to
Skipweasel

One of these

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found it in an air raid shelter buried under a mass of ivy in the garden shortly after we bought this house. It can be taken off the trolley and used like a lance. I run it on diesel.

Mike

Reply to
MuddyMike

On 25/03/2011 01:23, Tabby wrote: ...

From a Victorian book on servants' duties and helpful hints; to dispose of bed bugs, wipe the wainscoting with petroleum spirit. Petroleum spirit can be bought from the chemist at 1/6d per pint. Do not do this by candle light.

Colin Bignell

Reply to
Nightjar

In article , Nightjar Petroleum

And we complain about 135p a litre...

Reply to
Dave Plowman (News)

Yes, but without the trolley and flame-hood. Sounds like a small jet engine but without the whining.

Reply to
Skipweasel

Good one. Apparently its still used for headlice too.

NT

Reply to
Tabby

The truoble with burning weeds is they just grow back. Can we use the piccy on wiki?

NT

Reply to
Tabby

True, but it's great fun and keeps the kids happy for an hour or two playing with big fiery things.

Reply to
Skipweasel

Parrafin does wasps in quite quickly as well. Can't think that just wiping the wainscot with petroleum spirit would elminate all bed bugs though, they hide in every little knook and crany near/in the bed.

Reply to
Dave Liquorice

Yeah then you can get your burner out again. B-)

If you zap the top growth enough times even the hardiest weed will eventuallt succumb. Then you only have to worry about seedlings...

Reply to
Dave Liquorice

In fact burning is the best because it kills grind based seeds ..

Nothing can stop wind blown seeds repopulating..except a long retention systemic weedkiller. And they are nasty if you ever want to grow anything there again.

We make bonfires on various pieces of ground. They are bare for a few months, then a few wind blown seeds get organised, and they become weed patches..those get mowed, and eventually mostly its grass that survives.

No, some weeds will survive even mowing. Nettles wont for sure, but dandelion clover and a couple of others do survive.

But all wild plans are 'designed' to reseed in bare ground..nothing can be done about that.

Reply to
The Natural Philosopher

It evaporates quickly, so I'm guessing its just a whole room fumigation effect.

NT

Reply to
Tabby

Mowing isn't zapping as in scorching the top growth with a burner.

Reply to
Dave Liquorice

You just beat the maid until she does the job properly :-)

Some of the other helpful tips in the book included how to recognise meat that had been coloured with red lead and how to recognise the rank of a visitor by the coronet or mitre they are wearing.

Colin Bignell

Reply to
Nightjar

From my 1900 copy of "Enquire Within Upon Everything".

TO DESTROY RATS.

The following receipe originated with Dr. Ure and is highly recommended as the best known means of getting rid of these most obnoxious and destrucitve vermin. Melt hog's-lard in a bottle plunged into water, heated to about 150 degrees Fahrenheit: introduce into it half-an-ounce of phosphorus for every pound of lard; then add a pint of proof spirit, or whisky; cork the bottle firmly after its contents have been heated to 150 degrees, taking it at the same time out of the water, and agitate smartly till the phosphorus becomes uniformly diffused, forming a milky-looking liquid. This liquid, when cooled, will afford a white compound of phosphorus and lard. As the spirit spontaneously separates, it may be poured off and used again for the same purpose. This compound, on being warmed very gently, may be poured out into a mixture of wheat flour and sugar, incorporated therewith, and then flavoured wtih oil of aniseed &c. The dough, being made into pellets, is to be laid into rat holes. Being luminous in the dark it attracts their notice, and being agreeable to their palates it is readily eaten, and proves certainly fatal. Note. - Chloride of lime is a good preventative, as rats have an extreme aversion to it.

Reply to
Skipweasel

The Effin Softy Police will be round soon...

Can't have kids having fun & learning to respect possible danger.

Wrap them securely in (flameproof) cotton wool immediately.

Reply to
The Medway Handyman

Daughter's latest happy hour was spent making bonfires of steel wool.

Actually, there was a lot of learning crammed in as well - where did the energy come from, how are we releasing it, is it a reversible change, why doesn't it work all scrunched up, how could we make it burn hotter/faster etc. Well worth half a hank of fine steel wool and a few bits of eyebrow.

Reply to
Skipweasel

Yours or hers?

Colin Bignell

Reply to
Nightjar

Both.

Reply to
Skipweasel

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