Seven most outrageous HOA rules

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The little experince I've had with NAs (not HOA) has been very positive. Just people trying to keep the neighborhood from going to crap. I didn't read the NA contract at signing but I would the next time. I mean, who actually reads all the stuff? <g>
Jim
Jim
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WE do, as investigators and agents of property management companies. Mainly to see what exactly the HOA dues fund is specifically responsible for, but then we get all this other stuff:
We have come up with such interesting things as: A property being listed as located in two different cities and the county. (This is common with lazy cut and pasters.) Pool maintenance being delegated to the HOA, when there was no pool. Rules that visitors under the age of 10 years old could not park their cars on the street, but must use designated parking. Rules that specified the exact shade of red that was to be used for curbs, using some international color code. Rules to standardize doorbell buttons. Rules to standardize the light bulbs you can use at the entrance of your home. (No bug lights.) Rules that go into very intricate details about how you can put out your garbage, and what hours you can put it out, and how much time you have to bring your cans back in. The type and color of cans you can use. The power washing of cans regularly. The amount of smoke one can put out from an outdoor cooking device, and the hours one can put it out. The proper procedure, timing, and way to pick up and dispose of pet waste, even going in to details when the waste is of the consistency that it cannot be picked up, in which case it must be hosed down into the lawn for certain distance from the point of "deposit." The outlawing or requiring of peepholes in doors. The color of exterior doorknobs. Pool attire, including shoes, and the outlawing of some types of robes and towels that have sayings on them. Rules on bathing caps in the pool, and the banning of them inside clubhouses.
You get the idea. I could go on for hours.
Steve
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wrote

I was fortunate because I was in the position of needing the NA's help rather than being on the other end. When I did finally read the contract I didn't see anything I would have objected to. It was just common sense stuff like mow your yard and no broken down cars in the street, etc... My problem was with a neighbors outdoor 12" speakers blasting at 2:00 am. Sure enough there was a "no outdoor speaker" clause. One threat of a lawsuit and the speakers were gone.
Jim
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LOL, or if they find they don't enjoy some of the rules they run for one of the positions on the HOA board and they CHANGE the RULES they DISLIKE...
The problem is that most people in such "communities" fall into the trapping that "someone else" will take care of the common areas -- well "someone else" does, the HOA board officers who can create the rules... Sadly most people paying into such communities are only concerned with the bottom line (how much their fees will be) and fail to pay attention to much of the minutiae of how the little hamster on the wheel hidden in the back room secretly keeps things running...
By the time they are a subject to a rule they don't like (or its recent strict enforcement by a newly elected HOA board) it is too late to fight it, you have to do what you are told until the next time the HOA board is elected...
It is the SAME EXACT process that happens on the local city/town municipal government in most of the US... No one pays much attention to what goes on except for a few "issue zealots" once the issue of the next year's tax rates have been determined, everyone goes back into their 11.5 month coma until the following year leaving "someone else" (in this case the people who got elected into local offices or appointed to local boards/committees) to mind the store totally in control of what goes on with input mostly from those crazy "issue zealots" who come to every meeting complaining of some malady that happened to them six months ago that they "keep reliving in their mind" and bother enough of those in charge that they pass a new ordinance to get rid of the person...
Like the little old lady who stepped in dog mess once and keeps coming in until there is an ordinance with some teeth to it, like a $200 fine or jail time for violations because she had to throw away her favorite pair of old people shoes...
Or the cat lady who had a stray dog come up on her porch that wants all dogs to in kennels/pens or on a leash because that one stray mean old doggie scared her and the unholy pack of cats she keeps cooped up in her house...
Such is life in America -- whether its your HOA or your local government, your disinterest in the minutiae of daily life gives the people that step forward to shoulder the burdens of dealing with such things extraordinary power they would not otherwise have if everyone they had authority over paid some attention to what was going on more than they do now...
~~ Evan
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So what you are saying is they probably would not like the tomato plants I have in my front yard and the clothes line in the back?
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http://theweek.com/article/index/104150/top-7-insane-homeowners-association-rules
I am a property analyst for a licensed reserve study company. We go and inspect every property that has a HOA at least every five years. There is an annual update, too. We do not do EVERY one in the state we work in, just the ones who choose our company. We have done six hundred properties in the last year and a half.
We go and count the asphalt, sidewalk, curb, landscape, and everything that a homeowner's dues pays for so that they collect enough money to pay for the items as they wear out, and so that the homeowner (supposedly) has accountability for the money they give in dues.
We have nothing to do with the rules, the boards, the board members, the hoa members, advising either side on issues, we just count beans. There have been countless times, though, when we did have to inform management or members of what EXACTLY their CC&R's DID or DID NOT state, as they were doing something in error. But we just do that, and then they keep on doing whatever it is they want to do anyway until someone calls them on it.
Still, when we are out there working and taking pictures, we get some doozy stories of just such things. One fellow took out grass as a money saving thing with the water department (allowed) but when he replaced it with rock, the board did not like the shade of rock. He showed me the one he had to have replaced, and it looked to me very close to the new shade. One old lady went around with a measuring tape and measured lawns and weeds.
We live at the end of a dirt road way out in rural Utah. I would never ever buy in a HOA even if I wanted to just live in a place where I didn't have to do any of the maintenance. A place like that would be okay, but they will fuss with you about damn near everything you do, right down to the color and number of flowers.
We have a HOA at our cabin. There are fifteen homeowners, and the dues are $25 a year. There has never been a meeting since 1984, and there has never been a dime collected. When something needs done, we just pass the hat, and get it done. We did have one time when we bought road base to make the mud a little better. There were two who didn't want to chip in, so guess who's lots didn't get road base.
It is a requirement now that any housing development with 10 or more houses must have a HOA. Ah, just what we need. More laws.
Steve
read about heart surgery and how to prepare for it at: http://cabgbypasssurgery.com
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Steve B wrote: (snip)

Increasingly common, and perfectly abhorrent to me. The HOA becomes, in effect, the lowest unit of local government, providing the services that the real local government is supposed to provide, and artificially keep local tax rates low. What is the next step- offloading local law enforcement on the HOAs? Oh, right, the 'gated communities', aka HOAs from hell, already do that. Local cops only come in when called- the contract guards keep the riff-raff out.
We are only a couple major economic burps away from the feudal system coming back, methinks. The few people with money will own the modern versions of villages, and everyone else will either pay tribute to them for protection, or work for them. That Black Sheep nursery rhyme where it talks about one for my master, and one for my Thane? The Thane would be the HOA, and the bag of wool the monthly assessment.
--
aem sends...


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Well, not that I believe that, since there are VERY few HOAs around here and a TON of new, large developments, what idiot buys a house in a "development"? Anyone, anyone?
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aemeijers wrote:

My community organization contracts with the Constable's office to provide 'round the clock patrol. If something bad goes down, they hold the perp and turn him over to the local police. Their main jobs are to "cruise and be seen," and to hassle hippies.
In my state, constables are the law enforcement arm of the justice courts. They act as bailiffs and serve civil papers (evictions, subpoenas, divorce service, etc.). Since they are official LEOs, a cottage industry has grown up contracting with the constable for dedicated neighborhood police protection.
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wrote:
Sorry, you're the douchebag. You bought into an HOA (seriously? no sane person does that) and you don't understand where and/or when to use apostrophes. So..YOU LOSE. Replonk. And STOP climbing out of the bozo bin LOSER! Bloody hell!
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tmclone wrote:

Not to worry. There's a rule of the universe called "The Law of Apostrophe Conservation." It states simply that an erroneous use of an apostrophe is simultaneously accompanied by a superfluous one somewhere else on the planet.
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