I like the story where a guy was walking along with his ol' yeller dog
when the town bully and his pit bull came up to him. Words ensued and
the second guy sicced his pit bull on the yeller dog. After a short
flurry, the yeller dog opened his mouth, bit the bull into two pieces
and proceeded to eat him on the spot.
Horrified, the bully asked "What the hell kind of dog is that??!!!"
"Well, before I cut off his tail and painted him yellow, he was an
I'm fond of the stand-up routines of a comedian named Gamble Rogers (now
deceased, I believe) whose stories tended toward rural themes and often
My favorite is one where Bill comes in from the street looking for the owner
of a Great Dane that his dog has just killed. The big dog's owner says "Good
Heavens, what kind of a monster do you have out there?"
Bill says "Chihuahua."
How in the world did your Chihuahua kill my Great Dane?!"
Bill says "I believe it's stuck in his throat!"
Well, at least they've got the name right. Those chihuahuas have the
most vile temperament with strangers I've ever seen. My aunt had one
that, even when it was over 15 years old still tried to gum you to death
if you were to get close to it. Yippy things, too. Can you imagine a
dog that weighs over 150 pounds with the temperament and yappiness of a
Taco Bell dog? [shudder]
Talk about your science experiments gone horribly wrong.
That reminds me of the time Rocket nailed the St. Bernard. Rocket was a
mostly terrier mutt.
After Rocket nailed the St. Bernard, she dragged him around, upside down and
backwards, by his trapped penis, for every bit of 15 minutes.
Damndest thing I ever saw.
(Rocket lived to be 18, and the event in question did not kill him,
(The owner of the St. Bernard elected to give the dog an abortion, so we
never got to see the results of this match.)
Michael McIntyre ---- Silvan < firstname.lastname@example.org>
Linux fanatic, and certified Geek; registered Linux user #243621
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