OT more or less: A jazz trio is playing...

dadiOH · 2012-04-08T12:17:37+00:00

A jazz trio is playing a gig at an upscale nightclub. They play aclassic bebop tune at a fleet tempo with grace and ease. Then comes aWayne Shorter composition filled with mysterious harmonies, poignantmelodies and daring improvisations. Next they present a medley oflesser known Harold Arlen songs that only a connoisseur wouldrecognize, again played with elegant styling and exquisite taste.The whole evening has been one dazzling performance after another.Though the trio is playing background music and not a formal concert ,the audience can sense that the musical display they arewitnessing is of such a high caliber that the musicians should beallowed to perform as they please without interference.Then a well-dressed middle-aged man approaches the bandstand and asksthe pianist "Can you play Lara's Theme from Dr. Zhivago?" The pianisttells the man that they are jazz musicians and that they usuallydon't take requests of that sort. The man reaches into his coatpocket and pulls out three one hundred dollar bills which he lays outon the piano. The pianist looks at the bass player and drummer andsays "Lara's Theme in G."They play the tune in the fashion of the original version, thepianist emulating the Balalaika textures with a delicate upperregister tremolo. The song obviously does not present the same levelof difficulty that the trio is accustomed to dealing with.As the pianist plays, he absent-mindedly gazes at the soundboard ofhis ebony Steinway B and wonders about the grain in the wood. Howwould the tonal characteristics be altered if the grain of thesoundboard ran perpendicular to the strings rather than parallel, hesilently asks himself.The bass player amuses himself with an assortment of well-placeddouble-stops and harmonics. He daydreams as he looks at the top ofhis mid-nineteenth century double bass made by French master, PaulClaudot, and wonders "How many times has the top been varnished, howdid the varnish of past years differ from today's, how would...

Apr 08, 2012 27 Replies

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Greg Guarino 14 years ago

I didn't, and it was. I was there.

The kit was black to begin with, so the damage may not have been obvious to the audience (outdoor show). It was mostly the bags that had caught fire, but some of the shells were charred. I don't know how he connived the cop into giving him a lift after his car was towed, but he did, arriving with the siren blaring and the lights flashing.

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-MIKE- 14 years ago

I posted the story on my facebook Nashville drummers' group.

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Swingman 14 years ago

How can you tell if a drummer has been doing the crossword?

All the squares have been colored in.

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Swingman 14 years ago

That same drummer:

This band is playing a small bar, and the drummer is really drowning his sorrows. Between sets he goes into the bathroom. Suddenly a 'blood-curdling scream rings through the bar. About 5 minutes latter a shrill scream pierces the air of the bar again. The bartender decides that he had better go see if this guy is okay. Pounding on the door he asks, "Is everything ok in there?"

"No!" says the drummer. "I'm sittin' on the john, and I tried to flush when something grabs me by the nuts! I tried again but the same thing happened! Get help!"

The bartender says, "Let me see if I can help." He opens the door and says, "You idiot! That's the mop-bucket!!"

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Greg Guarino 14 years ago

Some more drummer ingenuity:

We have played in a wide variety of venues over the years. This one had a tile floor, if memory serves. Tommy (the drummer)always arrives first; he's generally set up (and halfway through a Heineken) by the time I stroll in. I notice that rather than the usual carpet, his kit is sitting on the four floor mats from his car. My Dad would refer to that sort of thing with an old Army term: "field expedient".

One of our singers forgot to bring dress shoes to a tux gig. There was a time when our bass player was the custodian of the Emergency Shoes, a set of old Large-Enough-To-Fit-Anyone generic black dress shoes that he kept with the lug wrench and jumper cables. But not anymore. Tommy had the solution: wear black socks OVER your sneakers. No one noticed.

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Dave 14 years ago

On Fri, 13 Apr 2012 13:10:21 +0100, Stuart Just ignore him.

Where's the fun in that? Poking trolls with a sharp stick is a national pastime here.

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Steve Turner 14 years ago

Ooh boy, forgetting to bring a rug to a gig where the setup surface is an unknown can lead to a very bad day. Been there, done that! You definitely learn to make do with the "tools" you have available to you.

LOL!

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