Access Granted

To celebrate my forthcoming birthday (same as Beethovan's, if you're curious), and the holiday season - doesn't matter what religion you are, if nothing else, it's a few days off - think positive - I'm posting the link to my woodley pages. Plans, inspiration, et al. Anything you like, make quick use of it, because access won't be forever. Accss will be terminated even sooner if some dummy whines about a dead link, or something. Should be enough to get you started.

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Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah (?), Happy Quanza (?), Happy Song Kron (?), and whatever else I didn't cover. I'm spiritual myself, but tolerent of about any religion except human, or animal, sacrifice - unless it's chickens, and they're cooked later, that religion I could definitely live with. Now would also be a good time for you guys to send along a small sacrifice for the Woodworking Gods too. A short, slightly plump, HUMAN female (some of you guys have some verry strange ideas), slightly used virgin, who can cook, and likes to do housework, and fishing, will do nicely. Or, send some nice free wood. Google is our friend.

JOAT A rolling stone gathers no moss...unless it's a hobby he does on the weekends.

Reply to
J T
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ROTFL ... happy B'day ... hope you make it.

Speaking of making it, wonder if Apeman lived through that last marriage?

Reply to
Swingman

Yep; birthdays, good; Beethoven, good; holiday season, good; playing weakest link, good; religion as it is nowdays, not as good as real faith in something; chicken, good; sacrificing a slightly plump virgin, used or not, who can do all of that?

Somebody send this guy some clean lumber before he finds our daughters!

Happy Birthday Jack, Tom in KY who is a pretty good Baptist boy but has his fair share of deficiencies.

Reply to
squarei4dtoolguy

"How to Argue Politics with a 2X4 (If You Must)", by FredFighter.

"The Big Type Encyclopedia of Pointy Sticks", by Charlie B.

"How to Win Friends and Influence Woodworkers, NOT!", by Bay Area Dave.

"A Wooddorkers Guide to Style, from Plato to Thelonious", by Tom Watson.

"Shipping and Receiving (To Avoid Trunnion Damage)" w/bonus section on right/left tilt tools, by Leon.

You got lots of work to do, Bubba ...

Reply to
Swingman

LOL... Not seeing him around much would indicate that he may be on a very short leash.

Reply to
Leon

Happy Birthday Jack and your wish list reminds me of the guy looking for a new wife, one that owns a fishing boat and wanting the interested applicants to please send a picture of the boat. LOL

Reply to
Leon

Happy Birthday, Jack! Virtual presents on the way.

BTW, couldn't find a link for fancy push sticks on your site.

Vic

Reply to
Vic Baron

Happy birthday. Beethoven, huh? Jeez, you're older than dirt. Anyway good luck with the chicken and the virgin. squeek, jo4hn

Reply to
jo4hn

Happy Bday JT. If ya find the wife, find out if she has a sister.

jc

top posted for my convenience.

Reply to
noonenparticular

Careful - statements like that sound like a whine - don't get him started.

Happy birthday, Jack. Great website.

-jj

Reply to
JJ

Thanks.

Good stuff. Love the books.

--=20 Will R. Jewel Boxes and Wood Art

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power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those=20 who have not got it.=94 George Bernard Shaw

Reply to
WillR

Thanks.

It's the concept of a "slightly used virgin" that intrigues me.

Reply to
Charles Self

She certainly would not be "Extra Virgin" would she.

Reply to
Leon

Olive Oyl, Popeye's girlfriend?

Watcha butt JOAT. And have a happy birthday.

Reply to
Charles Self

AAArgh!! My bad! - SOooooooooooooooo sorry Jack!

V
Reply to
Vic Baron

Only if her olive weren't ripe yet.

Else she would be just plain "virgin" or at worst "pure".

Now if he got her after the second pressing, she might be a little wrinkled around the edges. But hopefully she'd still have a nice pit.

That's all I have -

V
Reply to
Vic Baron

Wed, Dec 14, 2005, 11:08pm (EST+5) snipped-for-privacy@hotmail.com (Vic=A0Baron) tries hard with: Only if her olive weren't ripe yet. Else she would be just plain "virgin" or at worst "pure". Now if he got her after the second pressing, she might be a little wrinkled around the edges. But hopefully she'd still have a nice pit. That's all I have -

Someone smack him.

JOAT A rolling stone gathers no moss...unless it's a hobby he does on the weekends.

Reply to
J T

| Now would also be a good | time for you guys to send along a small sacrifice for the | Woodworking Gods too. A short, slightly plump, HUMAN female (some | of you guys have some verry strange ideas), | slightly used virgin, who can cook, and likes to do housework, and | fishing, will do nicely. Or, send some nice free wood.

Oops! Sorry - already gave my free wood to a short, slightly used virgin, who then wandered off into the mountains, and I never saw her again. She was a terrible cook and hated housework, so you're probably better off without.

Happy birthday anyhow!

-- Morris Dovey DeSoto Solar DeSoto, Iowa USA

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Reply to
Morris Dovey

Wed, Dec 14, 2005, 9:18pm (EST+5) snipped-for-privacy@worldnet.att.net (Charles=A0Self) dazedly says: It's the concept of a "slightly used virgin" that intrigues me.

That's all explained in the booklet you get after you send in your sacfice to the Woodworking Gods. Hard to miss, there's a complete chapter on it. If you're trying to skate, claiming you didn't get a booklet, forget it.

JOAT A rolling stone gathers no moss...unless it's a hobby he does on the weekends.

Reply to
J T

Thank you all for the birthday wishes. I've got a few very nice gifts coming, just what I wanted. I know, because I bought them for myself. LOL

And, thanksfor the fact that none of you irritated me enough to make me change the link.

Happy holidays. And, since this is an international group, here's an international holiday card for all to enjoy.

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Ho ho ho.

JOAT A rolling stone gathers no moss...unless it's a hobby he does on the weekends.

Reply to
J T

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