What sort of wall should I bang my head against?

[ARW]

My parents have no idea about security.

I replaced all the alarm PIRs for pet sensor ones so that they can leave the dog in the house and set the burglar alarm. This follows on from two faults over that last couple of months or so on their alarm. The first was that the battery failed and they could not set the alarm (a Veritas quirk) and the second was a failed PIR (I got the phonecall from their neighbour when the alarm went off)

I called in today and the house had open windows and the alarm was not set.

Their excuse was "we were only out for an hour" along with "we only use it when we go on holiday"

It's tempting to get a mate to break in and leave a note in the house telling them to get a grip on security and "pinch" a car from the garage (all the keys are on display or are easy to find).

I even found a set of keys for my house with my name and address on them (they no longer fit my door locks as I replaced them 4 years ago and I never gave my parents a new set of keys)

This is not the first time I have had words with them about security. I would not mind but my Dad is not stupid (my Mother is) but he is worse than her when it involves security.

Any ideas other than staging a break in to get them to wake up?

[F]

[snip]

Without wanting to upset or alarm (pun not intended) you, but this was the kind of thing I heard when my father's dementia started to become apparent...

Have you seen any other changes in behaviour?

[Andy Burns]

Similar, mine had a TomTom taken from the unlocked car on the drive, I think they're still in the mentality of "that sort of thing doesn't happen round here" ...

[ARW]

No.

And I am sure about that one. I have had dealings with dementia before. And trust me if I thought he had it I would say something.

They have always been a little lazy with security. I am trying to shut the stable door before the horse bolts. They live in a nice house in an area with low crime rates and they have their heads stuck up their arses. They know nothing about crime and just think it happens to someone else.

BTW I admire you for suggesting the dementia. Far too many people ignore or do not recognise the first signs of it. The ex gf's dad has the first signs of it. I told them and they are choosing to ignore it.

[D.M.Chapman]

Go to

stick in their postcode, find the contact details for their neighbourhood policing team and email them?

Dunno if that'll work, but our local PCSOs are more than happy to pop around and chat about anything like this (largely as it lets them justify their existance :))

Would you parents listen to a proper (fake) police person with a uniform and everyhing instead of you? The sort of people who are stuck in the "it doesn't happen around here" mentality might be exactly the sort of people who would take notice of an official advising them otherwise?

Darren

[damduck-egg]

Mate never locked his car until one morning about 1 am I sneaked into the back and crouched down. He had actually called around to play a regular practical joke that had worn thin. Traveled about 2 miles before I sat up quietly, a minute or so later he spots this face peering from the darkness in his rear view mirror at which point I just said" Good Morning". An emergency stop ensued accompanied by screams of panic and then oaths of all kinds when he realised it was me. Never tried the practical joke again and started locking his car.

Putting a friend or acquaintance in ones elderly parents house might be a bit risky though.

G.Harman

[fred]

In article , ARW writes

Rejig the alarm to arm off a microswitch in the locking mech of the front door.

I've done this a couple of times when I knew the occupants couldn't be trusted to arm the system.

Depending on how the locks are used it can require a bit of setting up but I bet they don't lock the mortice when they're at home anyway.

[Bob Eager]

Even better if you used a Jack Nicholson mask.

[Nthkentman]

Local plod in Altringham push a helium balloon through open windows with a message on it... If found call this number..Leads to local nick where the caller is advised why the balloon is there, and what happens when burglars can get through the same size opening.

Quite effective

[Clive George]

Question is how important is it where they are? The security requirements for a house in London are different to those for a house in the Shetlands.

[ARW]

Their post code is.........

Best not say.

[GMM]

In part it's a generation thing: My father would leave his car unlocked on the drive, full of all sorts of useful/valuable things, only a few yards from a busy main road. His garage was never locked either, even when he was away, and he used to elave a set of house keys hanging up in there in case I, or any of my brothers, dropped by. I was always trying to tell him to change his ways but he would say if you can't leave things unlocked at home then where can you?

The answer of course, is nowhere, but he would never come around to that point of view, even after a couple of break-ins. The rate anything of any value (especially metal) disappears from outside my house (current record 4 minutes) suggests he was out of date....

[tim.....]

TBH surely they took the right approach to avoid a broken window AND a missing TomTom :-)

tim

[Brian Gaff]

Not really, you cannot control what others do. They may go on for years with no problems. If the worst happens then it depends on what that is as to how it affects them. You have done your best after all. I tend to subscribe to the feeling that I'd rather someone broke in easily and cased minimum damage than put elaborate locks and alarms everywhere and make it hard and then have a lot of stuff to get fixed.

Brian

[Tim Watts]

Still fairly civilised round here[1] fingers crossed.

[1] There is an occasional run on metal, eg lead roofing, gates, manhole covers - seems to have died down of late.

And there was a sad incident of a local gentleman who disturbed thieving pikey bastards at his farm and got run over and killed. Police nicked an awful lot of people in connection with that one.

But for the mostpart, you could leave your door unlocked most of the time - of course, sod's law says the one time you do will be when the chancers are about.

[D.M. Procida]

My attitude towards security is somewhat like theirs.

For me, the idea of being burgled is awful, but so is the idea of living as though I were surrounded by hostile and threatening forces, and I draw the balance closer to one side than the other.

Maybe it means I am more likely to be burgled than someone who is more security conscious, but maybe it also means I am more relaxed and less anxious.

Perhaps your parents also feel this way, in which case I think their feelings about their security - a fairly important thing - deserve respect even if your own feelings are quite different.

Daniele

[ARW]

So you leave the windows open and do not bother to set the alarm and think that you deserve respect?

[js.b1]

One note not mentioned is their insurance may be invalid if there is no sign of forced entry, or windows & doors are not closed etc.

This may be sufficient to wake them up, that they will lose financially.

Only other trick is sensors on doors/windows which turn on a light in the hall when left open on leaving the house.

[Tim Streater]

You - and they - will no longer feel that way once you *have* been burgled.

OK - it's true to say that, if the buggers want to get in they will, whatever you do, if they are willing to do enough damage, or if they really want that original Vincent you have. But it's also true that most opportunists can be put off by strong locks, a noisy alarm, and toughened glass in double-glazed windows like you should have anyway. And none of that, which we have, makes *me* feel like I'm "surrounded by hostile and threatening forces". Putting the alarm on when we go out is just a habit, like locking the door is a habit.

Taking simple security measures is just like simple hygiene. You go to the loo, you wash your hands. You get grubby hands from gardening, you wash them before eating. Simples. But I don't go around feeling paranoid about wiping every surface clean every two seconds as a result - even though the buggley-wigs *are* out to get you, as a bout of food poisoning after a family do earlier in the year showed.

[D.M. Procida]

I don't have an alarm, and sometimes leave windows open, and I don't think it makes any difference at all to how much respect I deserve.

I don't know how old your parents are, but if they've managed to get this far in life, I presume that they've worked out their priorities for themselves to their own satisfaction.

Daniele