Totally OT - Behaviour in Supermarkets

On Mon, 12 Oct 2009 14:43:39 +0100 (BST), Dave Liquorice wrote:

With our eldest, that didn't work at all, although with our middle one it did and the youngest is too young to have reached that stage yet. The eldest did grow out of it eventually.
SteveW
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On Mon, 12 Oct 2009 21:20:17 +0100, Steve Walker wrote:

It's terribly hard to work out the "reward" some times. I suspect you might have missed what your eldest was treating as a reward for the paddys. It could be something like leaving the shop before finishing what you went there for, as they didn't like that shop for some reason.
I think the keys are not to give in once you have said no(*) and if you make a threat be prepared to carry that threat out. So don't make threats you can't carry out! It only takes one or two threats not to be carried out for the child to come to the conclusion that threats are harmless and can be sfely ignored.
(*) At least not as a direct result of throwing a paddy or other unacceptable behaviour. Tell them that if they calm down behave nicely for a pewriod of time they might (don't tell them the will or promise they will) get what they want or some other reward.
--
Cheers
Dave.




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Dave Liquorice wrote:

Small child outside shop crying loudly. Stops a bit. Cries a bit more. "Mummy, can't you hear me? I'm crying!"
Chris
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Chris J Dixon Nottingham UK
snipped-for-privacy@cdixon.me.uk
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On Mon, 12 Oct 2009 23:00:56 +0100 (BST), Dave Liquorice wrote:

The only difference it made was that he was told off instead of praised. We still finished the shopping, as we needed it, but he lost his treat (usually a magazine). Further punishments (loss of dessert and going straight to bed after his meal) followed if he didn't calm down and behave from there.

We tried offering rewards for good behaviour, we tried witholding things for bad, we tried threats of being sent straight to bed on our return home (and carried it out repeatedly). No matter what, he just seemed unable to stop the bad behaviour. He's still extremely stubborn and self-willed today, but much better behaved.
Steve W
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On Tue, 13 Oct 2009 23:30:41 +0100, Steve Walker wrote:

I know another young person who fits that description very well. Though she can behave very well when she wants to...
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Dave.




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wrote:

Our local B&Q seem to have frequent purges when the bin the F***ing lot and start again.
Derek
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