How do you remove blackcurrant cordial from a fat birds clothes?

[ARWadsworth]

Tonight I called into the pub for a quick pint with my girlfriend.

Now a fat bird joined us at the table and said to my gf "you make a lovely couple but what are you going to do in 20 years time when he is a pensioner and you are in your early 40s"

About 2 seconds later the table "fell over" and the fat bird was covered in her cider and black.

Two minutes later I was told (by the fat bird) that I have to pay for her clothes cleaning.

If anyone knows of a tent cleaning shop then please let me know as her jeans could easlily house a family of 6 if her fat arse was not in them.

[RCW2]

Send her down the car wash

[geoff]

In message , ARWadsworth writes

You want a bath full of conc. NaOH

Heat it up, drop here in, the fat should render down which you can turn into soap, which you can use to clean her clothes with

[TMC]

or give these a call

[Frank Erskine]

[Brian Gaff]

I saw an advert for tent cleaners on Google the other day.... brian

[Mr Pounder]

It was an accident wasn't it ? Tell her to f*ck off.

[The Medway Handyman]

Desmond - my decking buddy - makes some stuff called BOSH which cleans just about anything.

are just a bit outside of his delivery area though....

[grimly4]

Nah, biodiesel.

[Nick]

Local river and a couple of large stones. A length of sturdy rope might be useful.

[ARWadsworth]

I was an accident, honestly guv.

Were you there? That's exactly what I told her to do.

[Alan Braggins]

I'm sure your parents loved you anyway :-)

[hugh]

...and you'll be paying for it.

[F]

In last week's episode... 'Nipping out to the pub for a few hours.

Just asked the gf if she had borrowed "that dress" from her mother.'

So she's talking to you again?