A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, Be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled husband, "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be."
"Husband #2 was in Software Sales; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me."
"Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically, but he just couldn't get the system up."
"Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver."
"Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement and design a new state of the-art method."
"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not."
"Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it."
"Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it."
"Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it."
"Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was ... God I miss him!"
But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".
"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why?"
"You're with the "GOVERNMENT"... this time I know I'm gonna get SCREWED."