Which water softener to buy?

My current plan is to buy a water softener which will be inline for all of my water except for the sprinkler system and front hose bib. We currently use 5,000 to 10,000 gallons of water per month, but are planning on having two kids for a total of four family members. I think a good chunk of that water -- especially at the high end of the range -- is for the landscaping which would not go through the water softener. We are on Phoenix area city water with 20 grains/gallon of hardness.
How do I know how many grains capacity I actually want/need? I started with 32,000 grains and I wanted to get the Fleck 5600 Econominder valve and found this:
https://www.shop.uswatersystems.com/displayProductDocument.hg?productIdb&categoryId 
But the guy there tells me that although it can have 1" fittings it really is only a 3/4" valve and I'll see reduced flow as I currently have 1" pipes. He recommended a system with the Logix controller which uses the Autotrol 255 valve I believe and 55,000 grains capacity
https://www.shop.uswatersystems.com/displayProductDocument.hg?productId 6&categoryIdD
But I hear that the Fleck 5600 is more reliable and/or easier to repair. I also read that the Autotrol 255 is also a 3/4" valve anyways.
Can anybody recommend one product over the other?
PS - my current plan will cause my pool to be kept full with soft water (but I could bypass soft water when I fill it from empty) by my auto-leveler. My pool uses a salt system itself and thus I don't see how a bit more sodium will hurt. Although it may be a waste to keep the pool full with soft water, it avoids the need to run a new pipe all the way to the backyard. My other problem is that I will have soft water on my fridge which goes through an internal filter of some kind and is used for making ice and drinking water. Apart from a bit more sodium, is there any problem with this? Will it taste worse than my current tap water?
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https://www.shop.uswatersystems.com/displayProductDocument.hg?productIdb&categoryId 
https://www.shop.uswatersystems.com/displayProductDocument.hg?productId 6&categoryIdD
You will regret the softwater and pool. Unless you are very diligent on the pool chemistry. Public pools do use a portion <45% of softwater depending on the hardness available. Public pools also have all sorts of controls that can shift the supply valves back and forth.
Drinking soft water is a serious no-no. Unless you have a RO unit on the refrigerator you will be ingesting a lot of sodium or potassium depending on what you use to soften the water. My last house I ran a 3/8 copper line (unsoftened) to the kitchen for drinking water.
Your pool uses a salt system? You mean to make chlorine? Sure hope you do not get caught disposing of the waste product. It is classified as hazardous waste now days by the COP water department. I thought that they had outlawed chlorine generators some time ago.
I will bet your water service is one inch after it gets to the water heater it usually drops to 3/4 or 1/2 inch pipe inside the home. I doubt you will see any volume or pressure drop because of the softener.
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Dead on.....same as "what happens here stays here".
Oren "My doctor says I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes."
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