In-house visit by a "Rainbow vacuum" salesperson

[Gunner]

Probably not,....but having your girlfriend lay nude on the coffee table surrounded by candles and blank staring at the ceiling..visible from the front door..and wearing war paint and obviously trying to hide a dagger behind you as you answer the door..and asking them if they want to come in for the Sacrifice to Chluthu..generally puts them off their feed..... The Doors playing "This is the End" on the turntable with the bass cranked all the way up..was an additional kharma point....

You know..old ladies can really run pretty good if they want to.

Gunner

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[Melinda Meahan - take out TRAS]

I doubt it. I never had to say a thing. Just tell door-to-door types you're not interested while you are closing the door. Those of us who do go around on occasion looking for people who are interested in finding a church will appreciate it.

[Chris Lewis]

According to Ignoramus32056 :

Long ago and far away, the mother of a girl I knew asked me to sit in on a vacuum demonstration. Might have been Kirby. He did the usual stuff, which we thought pretty amusing.

Then her father got home, just as the salesman was getting to the "betcha this thing can pick up anything. Find something for me to show you" bit. Her father said "just a moment", went into the basement, and came back with a cylinder about

3/4" in diameter, 8" long.

Just as the salesman was moving the hose towards the thing, he asked "oh, by the way, what is this?".

"Stick of dynamite" was the reply.

The salesman was out of the house within 15 seconds...

[Charlie Morgan]

Put an ad in the yellow pages and leave us alone! Anybody who wants to find a church can easily find one without your help.

CWM

[Arthur Shapiro]

(metalworking group removed due to irrelevancy)

Despite the sales practices, the fact remains that the Rainbow is a pretty good vacuum, if not particularly frugal. I've had mine since 1978. Had the motor replaced once (don't EVER leave it for prolonged periods with the tank filled, due to evaporative corrosion) and recently had the motor and bearings overhauled due to normal age-related issues. One lives with the minor hassle of dealing with the tank - I just dump it into an old sieve and toss the crud into the kitchen trashcan. I have no complaints with the longevity, reliability, and performance. Obviously paying the door-to-door price is preposterous. I got mine for something like $300 or $350 as a model closeout at a retail establishment, which even in 1978 wasn't a horribly shocking sum.

It's an unusual niche product which performs well.

Art

[Michael A. Terrell]

Rainbow built a vacuum that would pick up a bowling ball. The only problem was that it could also pull carpet off the tack strips. They had to recall all of them and convert them to their standard motor.

[pyotr filipivich]

"What may I kill for your god.."

-- pyotr filipivich "Quemadmoeum gladuis neminem occidit, occidentis telum est. " Lucius Annaeus Seneca, circa 45 AD (A sword is never a killer, it is a tool in the killer's hands.)

[mc]

A lot of people appreciate door-to-door visits from local churches; otherwise the churches would have stopped making them long ago. It's an old-fashioned welcome-to-the-community thing. I suppose next you'll want to get rid of Girl Scout cookie selling.

[mc]

That's "Quemadmodum gladius..."

[Rod Speed]

Larry and a Cat named Dub wrote

Nar, MUCH better to nail previous evangelists and their children to the wall.

[Rod Speed]

mc wrote

do go around on

church can easily

Fuck all do in fact.

Mindlessly silly, just like with any sort of sales fool.

Wrong, as always.

Nar, just fools like you.

[Gunner]

...or "Who may I....

That incident actually happened about 1975-78is..the girl fiend was as deranged as I was (damn I miss her..she married a Congressman about her

4th time around)...and it earned us a visit from the local sherriffs department, which we expected and had cleaned up by the time they got there. Deputy friend of mine showed up...did the question thing..then on his way out..his shoulders started heaving..as he wiped a bit of missed war paint from behind my ear..and he left, laughing his ass off.

We didnt get bothered by evangelists for years..they would come down the street..and cross to the other side..waving their bibles in our direction...

Gunner

Gunner

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[Gunner]

You say that like its a bad thing?

Gunner

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[Gunner]

Stranglers tie collection with a name tag attached to each one....

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[Charlie Morgan]

I guess you won't mind when I knock at your door and ask your wife or daughter if they are interested in finding anal sex with a donkey? I have never heard of even one person that enjoys having demented god salespeople knocking on their door. It's not a "welcome to the community", its an obnoxious and arrogant intrusion by self serving, and self important assholes.

CWM

[Mark Lloyd]

I had a "visit" like that about a month ago. They seemed to be trying to look friendly at first, but it turned into pure proselytizing.

That reminds me of the "Kissing Hank's Ass" story.

[user]

Wow, you *are* deluded!

No, it just shows that people who are deluded enough to go door-to-door promoting their particular brand of fantasy don't have a clue.

It's an

"Hi! We're a bunch of nuts! Please join our club! We believe in magical beings! Do you want to believe in a magical being too?"

Uh, no thanks.

I suppose next you'll want to

Heck no. I LOVE thin mints.

- Rich

-- Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.

[Gunner]

This is actually quite true, and not just for those new to the neighborhood, but for the homebound and the elderly.

Shrug..but it is irritating to get a knock on the door on Saturday afternoon while Im knocking off a piece of ass, or enjoying a good book and a dump, sitting on the toilet..only to find a Watchtower being waved in my face.

They are generally pleasant though and go away when asked.

Gunner

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[Stormin Mormon]

Or the one at the store. The guy was explaining the odor remover product, and how it did such a good job. He took a cloth, and squirted on some vinegar. And offered to let me smell. And then a squirt of his deodorizing stuff.

Well, anyone with my chemistry background knows that vinegar smell is account of acetic acid. And most cleaners are alkaline. I could have gotten the same result with a crushed Tums, just neutralize the acid.

[Mark Lloyd]

"Hi. I'm John. This is Mary. Would you like to come and kiss Hank's ass with us?" :-)

I do too.

I remember hearing that Boy Scouts are a cult now, but Girl Scouts are OK.