Gas lawn mowers cause mental illness.
Everytime I have to clean out something from under my mower deck, or
something gets stuck and I have to go near the blade, I know it's
important to remove the spark plug wire for safety.
Everytime I finish under the deck, my mower will not start. It never
fails. I cant finish the lawn, I get angry, I take it out on another
family member or the dog, and cuss at least all sever forbidden words.
Then I call my psychiatrist who prescribes some valium, which I get
from the pharmacy, take more than prescribed, and get drunk to calm
The next day, or a few days later when I recover from my hangover I
walk past my mower and notice someone pulled the spark plug wire off
my mower. Some dumb asshole had the nerve to pull......... OOPS......
Oops, I did it again...... For the 9,999th time, I forgot to put the
spark plug wire back on the plug after I cleaned the deck......
DAMNIT and DAMNIT AGAIN !!!!
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