OT: Just got a juicer

[Tim Daneliuk]

One shakes *martinis*. But martinis are made with gin not vodka. Calling anything with vodka a martini is the act of a philistine...

[Tim Daneliuk]

You are deeply confuse - I'm not even close to being a right winger... I just can't stand the left.

[Tim Daneliuk]

Martinis are made with gin, not vodka.

[Tim Daneliuk]

It's missing one thing: 1 tbsp pickle juice.

[Morris Dovey]

Having visions of one apple, one orange, one muffin, three slices of bacon, and two eggs going into a Bassmatic...

[Robatoy]

[Dddudley]

What? And spoil that damn fine bass? LOL! That was one of THE best SNL takeoffs ever. Thanks for the reminder.

[Robatoy]

Even more memorable than Blue Cheese flavoured soda.

[LDosser]

It's a Breville. It separates the pulp and shoots it out the back. Centrifugal I think.

I think I'm going start needing to take an imodium before drinking so much juice next time. Sorry if TMI. :^]

---------------------------------------------------------------------- New Juicer Quick Step!

BTW, the fruit juices are loaded with calories ...

[Zz Yzx]

And sugar. Not good for us diabetics.

-Zz

[Robatoy]

Gag me with a spoon. Martinis are gin based. The ones with vodak [sic] in them are cocktails. And appletinis? Oy! Those are rude!

Robbie's martini secret recipe:

Tall, martini shaped glass. Frozen.

3 oz of dry gin. Sapphire or Boodles. Then.. in an adjacent room, one opens a bottle of dry vermouth. If there isn't too much of a draught, then it is safe to fill the Martini Dry Vermouth's bottle cap. A careful puff of breath aimed in the direction of the room where the gin patiently awaits a waft of vermouth vapours. Presto. No lemon rind nonsense, because, to quote Jackie Gleason: "If I want lemonade, I will ask for lemonade." NO ice, we are here to drink, not to skate. An olive? Maybe 3 on a skewer, weeeee little ones. . . Six of those and you're a stock-broker.

[David Nebenzahl]

On 4/3/2010 6:45 AM Tim Daneliuk spake thus:

I'm with you on the shaken-not-stirred thing, but dontcha think that old "gin only" ship has long since sailed? Methinks you're fighting a losing battle here. I have one friend/client who's a martiniphile and prefers vodka.

Myself, I like gin better, but alternate between the two.

(However, I do draw the line at "appletinis" and other abominations ...)

[Dave Balderstone]

Can[t seem to find it on Youtube...

[David Nebenzahl]

On 4/3/2010 11:42 AM Robatoy spake thus:

What was the one that was "A dessert topping! AND a floor wax!"?

[Lew Hodgett]

Gag me with a spoon. Martinis are gin based.

----------------------------------------- Guy walks into a bar, sits at the bar and attempts to order a "Perfect Martini", suggesting that he will tell the bartender how to make a "Perfect Martini".

The bartender objects stating he has been a bartender for over 30 years and is certainly capable of making a "Perfect Martini" and proceeds to make and serve a classic martini.

Guy takes a sip, spits it out and screams "RUBBISH".

Now I'm going to tell you how to make a "Perfect Martini".

Start by putting on a pair of insulated gloves, a totally frosted from the freezer,

3 ounces of 38F Bombay Gin gently poured into the frosted glass.

At a distance of 10 ft, quietly whisper "vermouth", then serve.

The bartender complied and served the guy's martini as instructed. . . . . . . . . .

Guy took a sip and exclaimed "LOUD MOUTH".

Lew

[David Nebenzahl]

On 4/3/2010 6:12 PM Lew Hodgett spake thus:

Yeah, yeah; I think we've all heard those "just give a sideways glance at a bottle of vermouth" prescriptions. (By the bye, didn't Herb Caen tell this same story?)

Myself, I'll use gin or vodka as I please (but prefer gin), and mix the drink in the proportions of a little vermouth:a lot of gin/vodka.

A frosted glass is always a Good Thing. And it should be a classic martini glass, not a tumbler or a Coke glass or a wine glass.

My personal recipe (not original to me, but given by some friends, Joe & Kirsten):

Obtain a cocktail shaker. Mix gin (or vodka) and vermouth in your preferred ratio. Put in 2-3 good-sized ice cubes. Shake the hell out of the shaker.

The drink is considered done when your hand starts sticking to the shaker.

The resulting ice crystals in the martini make an exquisite drink.

[Robatoy]

The BEST 'martini' (yup, that's what they called it) was a crew of demolition guys, hired to tear down 6 store-fronts on Queen West in TO, and it was HOT HOT HOT that day. They had a formula... and it fit exactly; a job-site cooler, which took the following: 2 x 40 oz of Boodles gin.

3 x 1.5 liter bottles of Schweppes tonic. ONE whole bag of ice. and one pint of lemon juice. . . . it was 106F that day. There were 8 of us...we refilled that sucker twice. We were intoxocuted.

[Lew Hodgett]

-------------------------------- The BEST 'martini' (yup, that's what they called it) was a crew of demolition guys, hired to tear down 6 store-fronts on Queen West in TO, and it was HOT HOT HOT that day. They had a formula... and it fit exactly; a job-site cooler, which took the following: 2 x 40 oz of Boodles gin.

3 x 1.5 liter bottles of Schweppes tonic. ONE whole bag of ice. and one pint of lemon juice. . . . it was 106F that day. There were 8 of us...we refilled that sucker twice. We were intoxocuted.

------------------------------------------ Went to a co-op school in Cleveland right down the street from the Cleveland Clinic.

My room mate had a co-op job working in the Clinic pharmacy where a supply of grain ethyl, all 190+ proof of it, was maintained.

Once and awhile, a bottle of "grain" would show up on our desk.

Time to hike 3-4 blocks to the local grocery for some cans of Hawaiian Punch.

Mix the magic elixirs together and place on outside window sill for 30 minutes.

(When you are 13 floors up looking at Lake Erie in January, it's cold outside.)

Ah the memories.

Lew

[LDosser]

I enlisted in the USAF in Cleveland. Spent my last night as a civilian there.

[Lew Hodgett]

---------------------------------------

Back in the days when I would partake a martin-eye or two, would keep a bottle of "Shine" in the zero degree freezer.

At 190+, that stuff would get your attention, as QUICK.

Made no difference your normal preference, gin or vodka, a sip of that stuff, and all you wanted was water.

Lew