Thank you all for your thoughts.
If nothing else, DadiOH's idea for the router bed could be just as much fun as destroying wood in any other fashion. But the more I think about it, the more I lilke it. {Think of chip storm of thinning a 12" wide board by half an inch! See, honey, I've been busy; sorry about the carpet.}
Lew, thanks. Someday when I am graduated to bigger-shop/more-time (ie: retired), I'll probably get serious equipment. Unless the government has _all_ my money by that point.