Removing bird sh1t from cars

[NoSpam]

We have to park under a tree and this year the bird s*1t problem is worse than usual. I can't avoid being sh@t upon (can't chop the tree down, can't build a car port, and the neighbours wouldn't let me use a shotgun) so I need to find a way of getting the stuff off every day.

Very occasionally a wipe with a damp rag works but usually I need to resort to scraping, and it's only a matter of time until I damage the paintwork. Is there any product available that will get the stuff off without damaging the paint?

Dave

[Vass]

a cat

[NoSpam]

:-) got one of those, he can't climb up the tree fast enough

[maciej.olchowik]

I once had the same problem. I found the solution by accident. I walked outside the house the other day and found a dead weasel, it was similar to:

think this had happened overnight when the animal was trying to jump between buildings/trees - but was unsuccessful on the occasion =( Anyway, I got it stuffed and preserved (just like hunters do with their trophy) and left it on the garage to dry out. When I went outside the next day there were virtually no birds in the area. I also heard lots of bird screamings that morning. I still occasionally leave it outside when sh&t problem gets worse.

Mike

[unknown]

Bah... I was waiting for the puchline. How can you include s*1t & weazle in the same story with making a hilarious reference to grease(d)

I'l have to make up my own punchline now which of course won't be funny because I'll already have heard it.

[Huge]

Then you have to remove muddy paw-prints and bird guts instead.

[NoSpam]

That's an interesting idea - all I need now is a dead Hawk or Weasel - I'll have a look on eBay :-)

Reminds me of a story ... how do you tell the difference between a weasel and a stoat? .... A Weasel is weasily recognised and a Stoat is stotally different.

Sorry, I'll get my coat ;-)

[Peter Crosland]

The techincal term is guano.

Peter Crosland

[NoSpam]

I knew that from a childhood watching a black and white David Attenborough standing on hills of Bat s*1t, talking about the smell of the guano. But I hadn't heard of a techincal before :-)

[Owain]

Owain

[Dave Plowman (News)]

I've not found anything better than soaking it with water and detergent. Of course the best thing is not to let it set too much.

[Peter Twydell]

In message , NoSpam writes

Use a car cover?

But you then end up with several sq whatevers of shit-covered fabric. Swings & Roundabouts.

[Alan]

In message , "Dave Plowman (News)" wrote

Instead of scrapping just leave a wet cloth on the dried shit for 10 minutes. Cloth baby wipes, with an additional soaking in water, work well.

[Simon]

Given that bird poo tends vary according to what they've been eating, how about putting out food for the birds that has treated with food colouring to match the colour of your paintwork?

[The Medway Handyman]

Microfibre cloth.

[John Laird]

Warm soapy water works fine, provided you don't let the mess dry hard (during which time it will also attack the paintwork). If you really have no choice over your parking spot, it'd be worth spending a bit of time upping the protection on your paintwork - the better that is, the easier it will be to remove bird crap with just plain water. A couple of coats of Autoglym's protective coat on top of a decent polish will last a while.

-- "Could crop circles be the work of a cereal killer?"

[White Van Man]

1 Angle grinder 2 Shotblast or failing that

I have heard that an Alka Seltzer tablet left on the droppings and gently watered fizzes the shit off.

Try hanging old CDs on the branches instead.....Pretty and scares the birds...