A couple of months ago I noticed a baby opossum snitching some cat food from the bowl in the garage.
"How cute," I thought.
Knowing that opossums are the gypsies of the animal world, I had every confidence the critter would move on in the fullness of time.
He didn't.
He has now grown to the size of a lawnmower and eats all the cat food. All of it.
So, a Bring-Them-Back-Alive trap is now waiting for his highness.
When I catch this monster, I'll either drive him 90 miles to Louisiana so somebody can feed ten starving kids for a week or sneak him in the back of the UPS truck where he'll end up in Nashville.
Regarding that last, hope you're aware of that old song, "The Cat Came Back" (substitute "possum" for "cat"):
Well old Mr. Johnson had troubles all his own He had an old yellow cat that wouldn't leave home Tried everything he knew to do to get the cat to stay away Even took him up to Canada and told him for to stay
Chorus: But the cat came back, the very next day, Thought he was a goner, but the cat came back `Cause he wouldn't stay away
Well they give a boy a dollar for to set the cat afloat And he took him up the river in a sack and a boat Well the fishin' it was fine till the news got around That the boat was missing and the boy was drowned.
[chorus]
Well the farmer on the corner said he'd shoot him on sight And he loaded up his gun full of rocks and dynamite The gun went off, heard all over town Little pieces of the man was all that they found.
[chorus]
Well they finally found a way this cat for to fix They put him in an orange crate on Route 66 Come a ten ton truck with a twenty ton load Scattered pieces of the orange crate all down the road.
[chorus]
Now they gave him to a man going up in the balloon And they told him for to leave him with the man in the moon Well the balloon got busted, back to earth it head, And seven miles away they picked the man up dead.
[chorus]
Well they took him to the shop where the meat was ground And they dropped him in the hopper when the butcher wasn't 'round Well the cat disappeared with a blood-curdling shriek And the town's meat tasted furry for a week.
[chorus]
Well, they took him to Cape Canaveral and they put him in a place Shot him in a U.S. rocket going way out in space Well they finally thought the cat was out a' human reach Next day they got a call from Miami Beach and ...
Got any contacts in the black community? I'm in upstate NY & many of our black families appreciate a good possum dinner.
Up here I'd call one of the Baptist churches- the pastor would know who would like it. [and who *needed* it]
They might want to pick it up. Those boys are pretty calm in a trap, but if you took one for a ride he might start pumping out adrenalin and it taints the meat. [or whatever the possum equivalent of adrenalin is]
I saw a lady on tv animal show who kept out dog food, 2 years later she had 30 some racoons in full view and was spending hundreds a month on food and didnt want to stop as she feared they would starve, animal control took care of it.
David Nebenzahl wrote in news:49549aaf$0$1516$ snipped-for-privacy@news.adtechcomputers.com:
David:
I don't believe it! It was decades ago I saw that cartoon on TV and laughed my ass off. I never forgot it. As I read the chorus, the tune played in my head like I heard it yesterday.
In my case, these are semi-feral cats. There are five of them, all males, and have been around for over six years. They are not pets by any means, nor are they completely wild. They more or less tolerate me and, I'm sure, are grateful for the meals.
Now some would view my interest in their welfare as odd but these are the same people who see nothing unusual about a bird feeder or a dog chained to a stick in the back yard! I just enjoy watching the cats slink about doing cat things. It costs me about $10/month for food and occasionally one has to go to the vet - a fair trade.
"Inside" cat? No, these guys aren't the type. I couldn't imagine one in a lap or snuggling under the covers. Frankly, we both have a pretty good life with the current arrangement.
You're welcome. However, I have no idea what "that cartoon on TV" was; I remember first hearing this from the folksinger Sam Hinton way back in nineteen-ought-seventy-something. (First person I ever saw who could whistle and sing at the same time.)
You havn't heard? Louisiana is over populated. The news anchors there are telling folks that to dependably get rid of critters, they have be driven at least 90 miles.
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