OT: "If Fred Got Two Beatings Per Day..."

Jan 09, 2012 41 Replies
Saved reading

Hey, it's an easy slio of the fingers, and easy to due.

Now, we need to discuss what is salvation. I've stored on disk a post which discusses six def'n of the word "saved". Means different things to different people. Amazing, that we can communicate at all, when words mean such different things. You've likely seen the email that makes the rounds, how the English and American military can't communicate. Like on aircraft carrier, if an American plane is down, it's broken. English plane is down, it's under deck, in storage.

Christopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus

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Thanks for the correction.

As for being "forgiven," you're the one who brought it up:

"Salvation is for anyone who desires it, and can find it, and accepts it."

I agree. Consider the word "prophet." In the Jewish world, a prophet (sometimes spelled "profit") is one who predicts what might happen. Further, all prophecy is conditional - it may or may not happen. The prime example of this is when a whale burped up a bleached Johnah who prophesied "Repent, or in forty days... I don't even want to think about it!" The people of Nineveh straightened up and everybody lived happily ever after.

In the Christian tradition, a prophet is a soothsayer, one who asserts that a future event will take place and all your king's horses and all your king's men can't do anything about it!

I'd have to do some research, but I'm fairly sure at leat a couple of the Christian prophets have given the "repent or suffer" command. I've got a fuzzy memory of the Utah saints having dry weather. The prophet revealed if they paid an honest tithing, the Lord would bring rain.

That kind of thing. Has to be at least one or two others I can't remember off hand.

Christopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus

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I agree. Consider the word "prophet." In the Jewish world, a prophet (sometimes spelled "profit") is one who predicts what might happen. Further, all prophecy is conditional - it may or may not happen. The prime example of this is when a whale burped up a bleached Johnah who prophesied "Repent, or in forty days... I don't even want to think about it!" The people of Nineveh straightened up and everybody lived happily ever after.

In the Christian tradition, a prophet is a soothsayer, one who asserts that a future event will take place and all your king's horses and all your king's men can't do anything about it!

there was the oral roberts fiasco. Send your dollars to me, or God will call me home. and the robots sent the money. What better proof would there have been , than if he would have died?

Uh, I don't think there were any Christian Prophets, save the Book of Revelation. But that Book is so wacky, it's contents could mean almost anything.

Any prayer, anywhere, does someone good...not necessarily the one who's praying!

I wonder sometimes. If I kneel in front of the bed, or at the wrong angle on the side. Will some elderly woman in Kansas City MO get a wicked head rush, which is the prayer I meant for someone in the next town over from me?

Christopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus

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Any prayer, anywhere, does someone good...not necessarily the one who's praying!

If you face toward Mecca, you should be okay.

I always liked:

"Lord our Father, our young patriots, idols of our hearts, go forth into battle -- be Thou near them! With them -- in spirit -- we also go forth from the sweet peace of our beloved firesides to smite the foe. O Lord our God, help us tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with their little children to wander unfriended in the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames in summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it --

"For our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimmage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! "

Amen.

Sweet! Is that a children's bedtime story?

Top posters are closer to God.

Christopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus

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He EVEN listens to "top posters"!

No, it's the "War Prayer" by Mark Twain.

There's plenty of evidence. For example, there were 200,000 eye-witnesses to the manifestation of God at Sinai. Plus women, children, slaves, and assorted domestic animals. Following that, there was an unbroken oral transmission of the event from generation to generation until it was finally written down.

As such, that event has as much validity as a report in the New York Times!

No, wait...

Never mind.

You got me. I bow to your greatness. So, so, so right.

Wasn't there a Youtube about the people of Walmart?

Christopher A. Young Learn more about Jesus

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Yes, of course. Along with a healthy dose of humor. Don't believe me, just go visit Walmart.

that became a whole website of its own

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I just hope it wasn't a cross-discipline course with English.

I don't "look down" on the theists. Just get a good laugh at their antics. They want to put their beliefs out there, they should expect some rebuttals.

Harry K

Now how did I miss that? I am a great fan of his and somehow didn't recognize the quote.

Harry K

It's obvious...God is pulling your chain! ;^)

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