If a tree falls...........

No, because it's a stealth tree. This is the whole idea. Microprocessors in the tree direct it when to fall, for example, if an Islamofascist terrorist is walking by. The next phase of the project involves adapting various species of tree to grow in the Arabian deserts. A logging subsidiary of Haliburton would then have rights to the wood, which will be sold, with massive Federal subsidies, at HD and Lowes as anti-terrorist lumber. The director of the project is Dr. Y.T. Daw (Your Tax Dollars At Work).