Rev. Wright?s Revenge
The American people remember how quickly President Obama dropped his preacher and spiritual advisor of many years when it became clear that the holy man?s message of "God damn America" was going to cost him votes. The Reverend who had baptized the Obama children had been a long-time advisor to the President was both hurt and angry at this public rejection.
President Obama, concerned about his plummeting poll numbers and dwindling respect among those who had been duped by his "hope and change" message decided to bolster his support among his base by inviting his old pastor of 20 years to visit him at the White House. The Reverend Wright arrived just prior to the record-breaking snow fall which had blanketed the city. Since the tons of global warming had made the roads impassable President Obama felt compelled to invite the Reverend to spend the night in the White House?s private quarters. The President retired early to ponder more socialist spending programs to further destroy our country and left his famous preacher and spiritual advisor to be entertained by our First Lady, Michele.
The next morning the President strode into the Oval Office and happened to look out through the full-length windows of this famous office and noted that someone had written a message in urine upon the pristine snow . He was both shocked and furious as the message read: "Barak has a tiny dick."
He started shouting to aides to summon the CIA, the FBI, the Secret Service, as well as the Black Panthers to investigate who the culprit might be. The government agencies got to work immediately on chemical and handwriting analyses. The Black Panthers got busy honing their switchblades, ready to bring instant (nonMerandized) justice to the malefactors.
By noon the government agencies had their report on the President?s desk. It read: "We have conducted a thorough and complete investigation of the incident and through careful scientific analysis have determined that the urine is unquestionably that of the Reverend Wright. Further, a committee of the nation?s preeminent handwriting analysts has unanimously agreed that the handwriting is that of the First Lady, Michele.
Perhaps the nation can now find respite from the numerous socialist programs being crammed down its throat by its overzealous ideological leader as the President was visibly shaken and departed immediately for his cherished childhood mosque in Indonesia to pray for guidance on how to handle the horns that had been placed upon his head.