It's still nice to be nice

Just filled the car up and as I walked across the forecourt were a mother and daughter struggling to fill a car up. Neither of them appeared to be bimbos.
Me "Do you need some help?" Daughter "Is it that obvious? The pump just keeps clicking off and I cannot fill the car" Mother "I've had a go and no matter how far I stick it in nothing is coming out"
And yes me and the daughter got the double entendre.
I rotated the nozzle by 20 deg so that it was "not vertical" and the diesel flowed in.
Me (to mother) "It's not how far you stick it in that matters, it's the angle".
I then went to pay for my fuel and left the daughter pissing herself with her mother looking a bit confused.
--
Adam

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On 19/05/2019 17:21, ARW wrote:

Well done! Nice story.
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On Sun, 19 May 2019 21:17:16 +0100, newshound wrote:

I feel cheated. I thought he was going to say he then took the daughter round the back of the garage and banged her.
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On Sunday, 19 May 2019 23:50:27 UTC+1, Cursitor Doom wrote:

Adam's a gentleman.
He wouldn't have left the mother out.
Owain
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On 20/05/2019 08:38, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

ROFL!
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On 20/05/2019 08:38, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

Adam is not Alan Clarke M.P. then!
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On 20/05/2019 08:38, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

Puts me in mind of a joke I heard recently.
Young bloke goes into chemist shop and asks for some condoms. Chemist:"How many would you like?" Young bloke: "Well, I'm going to see my new girlfriend tonight, and her sister and mother will be there, and I reckon they both fancy me - so I better have 3 in case I get lucky". Later on, young bloke is sitting down for a meal with girlfriend and her sister and mother, when her father comes home from work. Young bloke immediately shuts his eyes and goes into a deep mediation for about 10 minutes. When he eventually surfaces, girlfriend says:"You didn't tell me you were religious". He replies: "You didn't tell me your father was a chemist!"
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On 19/05/2019 21:17, newshound wrote:

It's a trick I learnt when I was still at 6th form college and I worked in an attended petrol station for a weekend job. A job that I kept on for holidays when home from uni (it fitted in with the full time staffs holidays).
My Brother met his wife in that petrol station. A blonde girl pulled in with a flat tyre and needed the wheel swapping. My brother was in the petrol station chatting to me.
Brother "Watch me pull this one" and then took off his top to show his six pack and went over to swap her wheel. The daft sod has been stuck with her since he was 17.
--


Adam

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On 20/05/2019 19:56, ARW wrote:

When I worked in a petrol station (teenager job), it didn't matter which way up the leaded petrol nozzle was (choice of 2*, 3*, 4* and 5* pumps in those days) and if you didn't listen carefully it squirted back all over you.
<snip>

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On 20/05/2019 23:09, Andrew wrote:

We still sold 4* when I worked in one.
And the Mini Metros were the worst to get to fill up.
Of course there used to be those that preferred to fill up them selves. And I said nothing as I watched PC Scattergood fill up the forces diesel landrover with petrol. He was a bit of a bastard.
The bit I remember the most was that we were used for directions a lot. The petrol station was one of the first places as you came off the M1 to drive into Barnsley. One evening a Manchester taxi driver stopped and asked for a particular street as he had to drop a load of luggage off that had gone to the wrong airport.
Taxi driver "Do you know where **** Road is" Me "No 36 for Helen[1]?" Taxi driver "How do know that?" Me "She's my girlfiend"
[1] I cheated a bit as she had already phoned me to say her luggage was on the way an hour before.
--


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On Tuesday, 21 May 2019 19:07:28 UTC+1, ARW wrote:

My parents were quite excited when they got a new car that took 3* petrol instead of 4*. Money saved.

"She's known for what she does to taxi-drivers. None of the local firms will pick up there."
:-)
Owain
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On Tuesday, 21 May 2019 20:16:19 UTC+1, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

I really don't actually remember 3*! Yes, 2*, 4* and 5*. And I know there was such a thing as 3* at one time.
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On 21/05/2019 22:07, polygonum_on_google wrote:

In the '70s and early '80s, the local garages here all had 2*, 3* and 4*, none had 5*.
I am trying to remember which disappeared first, 2* or 3*.
Now most of the garages have disappeared.
SteveW
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On 21/05/2019 22:52, Steve Walker wrote:

5* was around in te 60s for sure. I used it

3*.
IIRC it went to 2* and 4*.

No point in competring with supermarkets

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On 22/05/2019 07:45, The Natural Philosopher wrote:

My memory too. IIRC if you really wanted 3* you could blend it yourself. A few gallons each of 2* and 4*.
Andy
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On 21/05/2019 22:52, Steve Walker wrote:

The garage I worked at was owned by my school mates dad.
It only had a 5* pump because a couple of his dads mates had cars that would only run on 5*.
The other site had no 5* but the derv pump was at the far end, off the concrete apron, where 'big' lorries could get in off the road. The whole area around that derv pump was a sea of congealed leaky diesel engine oil, spilt derv and rainwater collecting in the depression wher the ground had sunk over the years. Luvly.
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On Tue, 21 May 2019 14:07:37 -0700, polygonum_on_google wrote:

I worked in a garage on the way into Brighton, on the London Road. I worked there two summers. The big difference the second summer was that there was a new pump (more modern design) and it had 3*! We already had 2*, 4* and 5* (much of the 5* was bought by snobs with low compression engines).
Not the best place to work. All the other workers were older men, and they decided that I could contribute to the tips jar, but as a temporary employee I wasn't entitled to anything from it! I managed OK...
Some of the time I was working on pre-delivery, with much nicer people (my boss was Sally Thomsett's dad).
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On 21/05/2019 20:16, snipped-for-privacy@gowanhill.com wrote:

Are you guessing or have I told that story? Broken neck, Christmas card and present and a nurse that took pity on me?
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On 24/05/2019 19:44, ARW wrote:

Bollocks. That was supposed to go to you and not the newsgroup.
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Adam

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On Friday, 24 May 2019 19:47:46 UTC+1, ARW wrote:

That's okay. The newsgroup email address doesn't work.
And I don't think you have told me.
Owain
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