OT: Father's Day

I rarely post OT, but this is SO right on!
======================== WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)?Americans sent over a hundred million Fa ther?s Day messages on Sunday, the National Security Agency reported toda y.
The hundred-million number, while robust, falls short of the hundred and tw enty million Mother?s Day messages collected by the N.S.A. in May.
The difference between the two figures is ?not surprising,? said N.S.A. director General Keith B. Alexander. He added, ?On the whole, mothers ta ke Mother?s Day more seriously?if the e-mails we read by mothers whose children forgot are any indication.?
General Alexander said that the agency collected in the neighborhood of two to three million such e-mails from angry mothers this year.
The N.S.A. director added that the agency had not foiled any terror plots o ver the weekend but did uncover between thirty and forty thousand extramari tal relationships.
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