wimminz is ungreatful

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One should never do home handyman items without the significant other at home and somewhat, if only lightly involved (cleanup, painting, etc), ESPECIALLY if they made the job suggestion. Always let them see you sweat. Most women who do not do their own repairs do not seem to appreciate any efforts that they do not directly witness, or that they are not involved in. I'm off on Fridays and weekends, and I make damn sure that I spend Friday like I want to, then do the handy stuff on weekends so she will see what's involved, all the while commenting on how much money those tools and I are saving us along the way. My handyman co-worker confided that he had also adopted this method, after not feeling appreciated for his efforts and savings. OTOH, I am also very willing to wash dishes and clean up when she cooks up a good meal. It's only fair.
RJ
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Backlash wrote:

Hee. Cooks a good meal? I guess I'm let out of the dish washing thing indefinitely then. :)
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Michael McIntyre ---- Silvan < snipped-for-privacy@users.sourceforge.net>
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It's all about balance. You did the right thing.

I feel for you. I was informed yesterday that fixing the downstairs toilet is "man's work." Is that so? (I don't remember clogging the thing.) Okay, how would a man do it? I think I'll be needing one of those underwater camera snakes for this job. And maybe a pump; I used a sponge last time and it took whole minutes to empty the tank. Life is too short.
My wife will likely never build anything in the sense of what we mean by the word "build" around here. I have to content myself with the odd positive remark, and play a numbers game. Ignore the bad stuff as best I can, and keep the projects coming so my chances of getting a good one increase. It's going to take awhile for your water heater day to stop smarting, but it will. Get busy with the next thing as soon as you can.
FWIW, I think you did a great job on your water heater!
- Owen -
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Owen Lawrence wrote:

Yeah, I like how this works too. "We're liberated. Its' the 20th/21st century, and we can do everything we want!" That means, to borrow an example from another post, that baking cookies is no longer "woman's work." But it still means changing the oil or fixing stuff like this, or digging the Hot Wheels car out of the brown end of the toilet is "man's work."
We're getting gypped on this whole women's lib thing, brothers. Our kids too. It's OK for girls to be empowered and to play with GI Joe, but if your little boy takes an interest in Barbie, SWMBO says noooooo way. (Of course noooo way I'm going to let the boy play with Barbie either, unless maybe he's "inspecting" her, but that's beside the point. :)
(I wonder how many youngsters are surprised when they get with their first nekkit woman and learn that they don't have a formless void in that area. :)
(Uh... Not that I know what Barbie looks like nekkit. This is, uh, just something I've heard.)

Aw, it doesn't smart. I'm used to it. I was mostly just bitching for comedic effect.

Thank you.
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Business of having her "help" to impress her with the labor involved is a mixed blessing at best. Saves time to do it yourself, in many cases, and I find I get better rewards for service when she's not "tired" from standing around handing and/or making four trips to the shop (~25') to get a tack hammer.
1) Empty-handed. "I don't know where you keep your damned hammers."
2) With the 20 oz roughing hammer. "There's so many of them on that board, how should I know? I'm not a mind-reader."
3) With a mallet. "Well, you said it didn't have a forked thingie on the other end."
4) With a tack hammer (one of two on the board). "Next time why don't you just get it yourself."
Indeed.
Ask her to bake cookies or something while you're working, putting in an appearance or two complete with sighs and grasps at the back. Refuse offers of help - you know where that leads - and ask if you can sample the cookies when they're cool.
When she comes out with the cookies, show her what you've been doing, and remind her that you make lousy cookies.
Now she's not tired, her ego has been stroked with the cookie praise, and she's not seething over being loudly informed for the 466,788th time how to tell a 3/8 combination wrench from a 9/16 - "Keeeeerist, woman, it's written on the side of the thing" - so you've got a chance. May not be gratitude, but I'll settle.
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George wrote:

Yeah, I get where you're coming from. It might not have worked either way though. Why should she have to slave over a hot stove all day to bake cookies -or- "help" me on the job when she has the option to go next door and spend all day goofing off?
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Is this the same woman you've poured your heart out over time and time again over the past several weeks, or did you go and find a new wife?
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Mike Marlow wrote:

Same one. All healed up, so now I get to complain about her again. :)
Hey, don't cry for poor SWMBO. She reads all my stuff, and gets a kick out of it.
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Michael McIntyre ---- Silvan < snipped-for-privacy@users.sourceforge.net>
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<snippage of a long, familiar story>
The key learning I picked up was that, with her gone for the 'project period', she missed the impact of 'no water' and/or 'no hot water', for the eight hours. Also missed the requisite three trips to the hardware store and/or plumbing supplier. Also missed the minor first aid portions of 'This Old House' out-takes.
To the uninitiated, all you did was play in the basement all day. And left a mess in the laundry room. She had hot water when she left, and when she returned. What was it you did? And you spent how much to do it?
BTW, given the choice, in my world, eight hours of plumbing work is a much preferable choice to 8 hours with the in-laws.
Life isn't fair. But then, you probably figured that part out long ago.
Patriarch, who NEVER does plumbing without someone there to at least call the paramedics.
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Patriarch wrote:

Did I give out those details? I don't remember if I mentioned the three trips or finding out why they're called "needle files" or not.

Preferable to ONE hour with the in-laws. :) (Or ten minutes.)

Um... I'm having trouble figuring out what was THAT dangerous.
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I'm an experienced homeowner. Water heaters are one of my nemisises (OK, Herr Doktor English Professor - you make a plural of nemisis!)
And it is Holy Writ in 4 of the Western World's leading religions that EVERY plumbing job takes three trips to the hardware store.

Propane torch. Natural gas. Soldering equipment. Large tanks, of questionable structural integrity, full of calcium deposits. ADRENALINE. Frustration. Testosterone.
Calculate the permutations.
Glad you survived. For giggles, turn off the gas on your way to work Tuesday. See how long before your cell phone rings. Or, less deviously, spill a couple of quarts of water under the tank.
Patriarch
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Patriarch wrote:

Nemises, I think.
Confirmed by looking in ye olde paper dictionary.

Unless you really screw it up, then it's more like six.

No natural gas here, but it was plenty scary enough doing water connections within squirting distance of my service panel. Especially considering what that LAST plumbing job looked like, the first time, after only three trips to the store.

Nah, let's just let the blasted thing do its job and forget about it for 30 years. :)
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I second the "plumbing instead of in-laws" remark.
When in-laws descend I will bus tables, clean up, or make ten trips to the store to avoid the face time. And plumbing would fit right in there. Maybe I should clog my own toilet so I could manufacture some work.
RonT
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snipped-for-privacy@webtv.net (Ron Truitt) wrote in 3175.bay.webtv.net:

Several years ago, I figured that, rather than go across town to the Thanksgiving feast, we should do it at our place. We invited 25, and 43 showed up. My eldest son managed to get the hall bathroom sink 'installed' at 2:30 pm, using silicone sealant, piping from a disused rug cleaner, and parts scavenged from the sink in the wet bar.
We had a great time. I worked my butt off all day and all night, then disappeared for the next three days.
NEVER tempt the plumbing spirits by working on critical systems, when the supply house is closed. Even if you swear that everything you need is on the shelf in the shed.
Patriarch
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Sat, Feb 19, 2005, 10:53pm snipped-for-privacy@users.sourceforge.net (Silvan) claims: <snip> Next up, the hot water heater. I noticed that it had finallyturned 30. It was still working, but after 30 years, I figured it was only a matter of time. The top has been crusty with rust for years now, and I've been kind of holding my breath every time I looked at it, hoping the tank wouldn't rust through before I could do something about it. So I got a super deluxe ultra floofy top of the line replacement. <snip>
You mighta jumped the gun. From what I understand, the tank itself is glass-lined. Should be no problem, as long as the glass isn't cracked. The outer shell, is just that, a metal shell over insulation. Mine is around 24 year old, and has quite on me I think 3 times. Solution, get a new neater element, around $17 at Ace. First time went to a plumber supply store, then found Ace had the same thing, cheaper. Turn off the water and electric, drann the tank, unhook and unscrew the bad element, screw in and hook up the new, turn the electric and water back on, and viola, good for a few more years. All in about an hour, or less, minus travel time. Ah, yes, you also need a special wrench to unscrew the element, available at Ace, for around $5-7. If I ever buy any stock, I think I'll get some Ace stock.
A few months back, did notice one of the water valves on top was leaking. I got the parts, around $25, including PVC glue and PVC cutter, and the younger kid had it a new valve on inside of an hour, minus travel time. No prob.
I've since learned, that almost every hot water tank that's tossed, would have been fine, with just replacing the heater element.
JOAT Intellectual brilliance is no guarantee against being dead wrong. - David Fasold
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snipped-for-privacy@webtv.net (J T) wrote in 3158.bay.webtv.net:
<snip>

--
Best regards
Han
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Sun, Feb 20, 2005, 9:53pm (EST+5) snipped-for-privacy@nospam.invalid (Han) asks: I have a gas-fired heater. How do I replace the element?
I don't know the details, but you dump the gas burner, make a fire box, and convert it to wood-burning. No prob.
JOAT Intellectual brilliance is no guarantee against being dead wrong. - David Fasold
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J T wrote:

Nah, there's more to it than that. Black soot trails leading out of the electrical box, and the metal all around the elements had that "I'm going to rust through any day now" look. They *do* rust through eventually. I had one in the last rental property I lived in that sprung a leak in the same general place, and started dripping water right on hot wires.
The top really was all to hell too. No parts from Ace could have fixed that if (when) it started leaking. The steel that the copper screws onto was so far gone that it would have turned to dust if I tried to get those connections apart.
If I get bothered, I'll throw some pictures up. I'm not going to go take any right at the moment because it's pouring rain and dark where the old heater is.
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"Silvan" wrote in message

So what do expect from a gender that will spend their last $50 on a $25 item that was *supposedly* marked down from $75, and gloat, while flat broke, on how much they "saved"?
Mine is ostensibly appreciative of the things I do around the house, but the reason ain't exactly flattering. It dawned on me years ago that what I save by doing so just means to her that she has suddenly been presented with the opportunity to "save" by having more to "spend" on sales/bargains.
That's gratitude, right?
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Swingman wrote:

I hearya.
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